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Preventing AbuseKathryn Patricelli, MA Updated: Dec 15th 2005
A great deal of abuse in life is unavoidable, and can only be escaped
once it has taken place. However, there are also some forms of abuse
that people get exposed to in their lives that can be avoided to some
extent if proper precautions are put in place early on.
- If you are an adult:
- You can take the time to learn what abuse is and
isn't, so that you immediately recognize abuse if it occurs to you or
someone close to you.
- If you have a tendency to be passive in
relationships with others, you can learn to be more assertive,
particularly in communicating your boundaries and what is acceptable
and not acceptable to you.
- If you have a tendency to be very assertive with
others, you may want to consult with others you trust so as to make
sure you are not habitually and unconsciously cross over the line from
assertiveness into abuse. If you are told you tend to be aggressive
rather than assertive, you can learn how to become more assertive
rather than aggressive in your interactions.
- If you are a parent, you should teach your child in age-appropriate ways:
- To identify what abuse is and isn’t and how to avoid circumstances that might lead to abuse.
- The difference between appropriate and inappropriate touching.
- What their body parts are and how they are
appropriately named so that they can properly describe it if someone
touches them in an inappropriate place.
- That someone might threaten them with violence
if they tell about inappropriate behavior, but that they should always
tell you.
- That they are allowed to say "no" when someone
asks them for something they don't want (being assertive), especially
with strangers.
You should also watch your kids for signs that something has changed
for the worse (behavioral, physical or personality changes that suggest
something disturbing has occurred), and ask them direct questions if
you suspect the worst. Take the necessary steps to track abuse down and
stop it from repeating immediately. Please strongly consider getting
your children and perhaps your entire family involved in professional
psychotherapy with a therapist specializing in the treatment of abuse
if your children have been abused.
- If you are dating:
- Expect that you might be drugged if you are drinking,
and take precautions. Never let your drink out of your sight. Use a
Rohypnol test kit to test if your drink has been spiked.
- Use the buddy system. Go out with friends and do not let each other out of your sight.
- Be wary and do not take unnecessary and
unintelligent risks (such as going home with strangers or meeting them
in a non-public place)
- Tell someone at home where you are going and when you will be back.
- If you do choose to engage in sexual behavior, be
very clear and explicit with your partner about the level of sexual
activity you are and are not willing to engage in.
- Carry your own latex condoms if you intend to
have sex with strangers (latex condoms protect against STDs where some
others don't) and insist that they be used.
i dont know why he abusing me - - Dec 6th 2008
i had a friend.we broked up andknow he abusing me...he only started abusing so i stopped talking to him...he abused my frens also... Abuse from Bipolar - Amy - Aug 13th 2007
The abuse and the bipolar are two separate issues. They need to be dealt with separately. Bipolar people can be abusive, but not always. Please don't think that her abusiveness is because of her bipolar. SEND HIM LITERATURE ON BIPOLAR - DONNA - Jun 26th 2007
Hello, I would send him literature on the disease however, I would not confront him directly and persuade him to leave this girl. A grown child will resent you and may not listen to you. I would be supportive and also keep in mind coming back from Iraq he is dealiing with his own mental problems. He may have them and he may think he cannot make the right decision. Try to be supportive and send him literature he can read. The idea is to let him make his own decision and sometimes its the wrong one, however everyone has to make their own decisions in life and learn from them.You can only guide him through support and let him open up to you if he can and in the end it will be his decision. I hope this helps. - vanniepl - Feb 11th 2007
son is getting married to a girl that is bipolar, he recently returned from Iraq and is now going through domestic abuse from his girlfriend how do I stop marriage or get him to see what is happening to him. Thanks |
