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He Won't Tell Me Why...


I am an ex-bulimic and I suffer from depression (for which I am seeing a psychiatrist). My problem is that 5 months ago I started going out with a guy who is 6 years my junior (I am 23 and he is 17). All the time he was head over heals in love with me, but then all of a sudden he left me. He refuses to tell me why, but claims that he still loves me. He also asked me not to call him. It has been 2 months now, and I cannot seem to get him out of my mind. I love him even more, and I spend most of my days crying over him. I am more depressed than ever and no medication seems to help. Please help me!

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  • ‘Anne’ is the pseudonym for the individual who writes this relationship advice column.
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Medication can’t solve all your problems. You have to keep in mind that although he may be mature for his age, he is seventeen. And although there are only six years between your ages, those are six important years. He probably has a lot on his mind right now…graduation, applying to college or finding a job, etc. All you can do is give him time. If he doesn’t want to see you right now, just give him his space. If he wants to be with you, you will know. It is not uncommon to end a relationship with cajolery. Only he knows whether or not he truly loves you. It hurts me to say this, but he may have been softening the blow when he told you that he still loves you. It sounds as though you are dwelling on these words. I know it’s easier said than done, but you do need to try and get on with your life. The more you think about him, the worse you will feel. You need to get your mind off your situation. In my opinion, time does heal all wounds. Give yourself some time to heal. Focus on yourself instead of him. I know you probably feel terrible right now, but this will make you a stronger, wiser person. Best of luck, – Anne

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