Question:
My sister has been having a very hard time with her husband…he has been verbally abusing her for years now. They have 3 children and she desperately wants to leave him, but she is afraid financially. I keep informing her that there have to be programs out there designed for woman in similar situations…but I don’t know really where to look. I love my sister and I want to do anything I can to help her. I offered her to live with me and my husband but we live in a small condo and there is no way we could all fit. If you can give me any advice to help her it would be greatly appreciated!
Ad
- ‘Anne’ is the pseudonym for the individual who writes this relationship advice column.
- ‘Anne’ bases her responses on her personal experiences and not on professional training or study. She does not represent herself to be a psychologist, therapist, counselor or professional helper of any sort. Her responses are offered from the perspective of a friend or mentor only.
- Anne intends her responses to provide general information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
- Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
- No correspondence takes place.
- No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by ‘Anne’ to people submitting questions.
- ‘Anne’, Mental Help Net and CenterSite, LLC make no warranties, express or implied, about the information presented in this column. ‘Anne’ and Mental Help Net disclaim any and all merchantability or warranty of fitness for a particular purpose or liability in connection with the use or misuse of this service.
- Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.
Ad
Ad
Answer:
If I had a dollar for every woman out there who is afraid to leave an abusive marriage on financial grounds, I’d be a millionaire. Most communities have a battered women’s shelter of some sort. I’d suggest you start by contacting the one nearest to your sister’s community and asking their advice. In the meantime, if your sister wants your help, you can help her make a plan for how to support herself financially should she decide to leave her husband. So long as she and the children are not in imminent danger of sexual or physical harm, there is no need for true urgency in leaving. Maybe your sister can look for a job, or go back to school so as to improve her job prospects. Maybe you can help her with child care as she pursues this educational agenda. Maybe you can help teach her about how to stand up for herself and to be more assertive (there are books in the library and available inexpensively online – ‘Your perfect right’ is a good one).
Ad
- Ask Anne
More "Ask Anne" View Columnists
Ad
Ad
Ad
Ad
