I become violent when drinking. The next morning when I wake up, I cant remember anything so I don’t even know what I was thinking and why I got so angry. It feels like I become a different person. When sober I am a very calm person that would never lose my temper. I know I should stop drinking but would like to know if there is something else wrong with me.
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You are showing all the symptoms of alcholism and it’s dangerous to your health and mental health. In other words, when you drink you become dangerously intoxicated so that it’s affecting your brain. Alcohol always affects the brain but when the amoung imbided reaches the point when you cannot remember what you did you are in danger of causing yourself brain damage. Also, drinking this amount of alcohol can damage your liver. All of this means that you need to stop drinking.
Worse still is the combination of violence and forgetting when you awake the next day after drinking. It is very possible that, when drunk, you could become so angry and violent that you hurt and even murder someone or get killed in a fight. Clearly, you lose control of your self when drunk and cannot prevent yourself from doing dangerous things that could ruin your life.
Yes, it is possible that there are other psychological problems along with your alcoholism. Very often, people drink when they are suffering from chronic depression. We call it self medication that does not work. First, alcohol is a central nervous system depressant and only worsens things while solving nothing. Another comorbid condition, a condition that goes along with drinking, is ADHD, Attentiong Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Yet another possibility is Bipolar Disorder. The point is that it is entirely possible that you struggle with psychological or psychiatric problems along with the alcoholism and may even be a motivating factor behind the drinking.
You need to get help now. The first place you need to get involved in is Alcoholic’s Anonymous or AA. People who get actively involved in their program have been shown to recover well. However, you also need to be seen by a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist in order to both get a psychological diagnosis and treatment for whatever underlying problems you may have.
Get help now.
Best of Luck