Signs That Someone May Have A Drug Or Alcohol Problem

Diagnosis is important in general because it helps doctors to know how to treat a problem. The diagnosis of a substance use problem (abuse or dependence) is important because it helps justify getting an addicted person into treatment.

Getting an addict to the point where a substance abuse or dependence diagnosis can be made is often a difficult task. People with drug and alcohol problems are often secretive about their use, or blind to the idea that a problem exists. It is helpful then to have a list of behaviors that one can look for that, when present, may suggest that someone has a substance use problem.

Behaviors to look for include:

  • A repeating failure to meet social, occupational or familial duties:
    • Repeated lateness or absence
    • Poor work performance
    • Neglect of children, etc.
  • Bizarre or lame excuses for social, occupational or family failures
  • Borrowing (or stealing) money without good reasons.
  • Uncharacteristic mood or personality changes

Physical signs may include:

  • Puncture marks, or long thin lines along the arms or legs (IV drug use such as heroin)
  • Skin Infections
  • Nose and throat problems (snorted drugs such as cocaine)
    • Bloody nose
    • Nasal and/or sinus infections
    • Coughing
    • Loss of the sense of smell
  • Drowsiness, or loss of coordination (depressant drugs such as alcohol)
  • 'Pinned' (tiny, constricted) pupils in the eye (secondary to opioid abuse)
  • Eye movement disturbances:
    • Nystagmus: back and forth eye movements during an extreme lateral gaze (secondary to alcohol abuse)
  • Red or bloodshot eyes (secondary to smoking marijuana)
  • Drug-related smells on clothing (drugs that are smoked)
  • Drug-related paraphernalia (pipes, 'works', pill bottles, small plastic bags or vials, lighters, etc.)

Medical signs (only apparent upon formal testing) may include:

  • Positive findings of drug related metabolic (break-down) byproducts in the urine, blood or hair.
  • Hypertension (High Blood Pressure) (may point to alcoholism)
  • Elevated levels of the liver enzyme 'delta-glutamic transferase' (GGT) (may point to alcoholism)
  • Enlarged red blood cells (may point to alcoholism)
  • sind lou

    i see all the results in someone close to me. addicted to pot most of his life he has almost two personalities close to a mental disability due to alcohol and weed, he has a beer belly and seems to change me since we first met, i just go with it but find this relationship becoming very boring

  • FAYE


  • Elizabeth

    Hi, I have a mum who smokes pot, she just told me about it 2 months ago. I am shocked and heart broken, becuase nobody wants a mum who smokes pot. She's a great mum, but she acts like it's okay to smoke it. But, it is NEVER OK to smoke pot when you have a daughter to raise. It's really sickening when I think about wanting to be a lawyer, because how am I supposed to defend the law when my mum is breaking it? PLEASE, I beg of you, if you have a kid DON'T put them through this. PLEASE STOP ABUSING ALCOHOL AND DRUGS, AND BE A REAL PARENT. Thank you

  • Anonymous-1

    I was addicted to weed, pills, and coke. Those werer the main three that I was addicted to, and I've try pretty much everything expect a few like heroin. At the time I was addicted I never relized how much I was hurting everyone around me and the fact that I was making my self distance from everyone. Its like having a black cloud covering you from reality, furthermore, all you can think about is where and when are you gonna get the drug. If anyone is reading this all that I say get some sort of help or you will pay for it later, and that includes the break down of your body. My advice is to take your self away from the environment.

  • concerned mom and grandmom

    I strongly believe my daughter has a drug problem, I know she smokes pot and I have found vicadin pills in my car, which she denies, she has quit her job by just not showing up anymore and is volital! I know I can not help her but she has a 6yr old son that we have been helping with ( she lives with her boyfiend, not the daddy) I need help keeping my grandson stable, she is now threatning to keep him away from my husband & I. I understand it is next to impossible to get a court order to get a child from his mom, One minute she is normal the next minute she is outraged and accusing us of anything and everything, Does anyone else have a problem like this?

  • Anonymous-2

    I recently have been thru something to that effect with my own daughter thank god it was a false alarm about the drugs she was just hanging out with a person that was dangerous for her and her 2 year baby( not the Father ) I ended up calling Social services on her because the same as you I had no rights they temporaly gave the father custody because she was angry with me and told the investigator that she would prefer for the baby to stay with the father after the has always been with me so I know exactly how you feel. If you are sure that she is doing something that would harm the baby by all means take action. The baby is innocent ot all this and how would you feel if something was to happen that you could of prevented get in touch with real father if he is around of course and depending on relationship with him. And see what you can do about that.

    Talk to her and tell you are willing to take desperate measures in order to keep the child safe that might give her something to think about . Let her how fast she can loose her child if she does not get her act together I did and it worked in a matter of days my daughter is now a full time student and lost the boyfriend in a heart beat to the point that he is now in Jail and she even changed her number and everything. We are now fioighting to regain Custody of the baby back to her mother.

    Somethings are worth doing but that is something that only you and your husband can decide.GOOD LUCK TO YOU.

    A concern grandmother RI

  • Karin

    My mother-in-law, who has been divorced from my husband's father, has been in 10 year relationship. She has been unhappy for an assortment of reasons but stayed with him. Recently, her boyfriend told my husband that she has a drinking problem. He gave some specifics like finding empty wine bottles in her gym bag in the trunk of her car, crawling up the stairs to get to bed, being passed out on the couch. Before we (the adult children) had a chance to confront her with our concerns, their relationship ended. We did approach her about it anyway and she completely denied it and was insulted that we could accuse her of being an alcoholic. We do not have concrete proof that she is an alcoholic, but we can't beleive her ex-boyfriend would lie about it. How do we find out if she has a problem and then how do we approach her?

  • a in TN

    I used to work for social services in Florida, and the information you provided would have been enough for me to take a report and have an investigator open a case to see how they could help your grandchild and your daughter.  In my time at the hotline there, I received many calls from concerned friends and relatives who themselves had been reported in the past for their drug/alcohol problems because it affected *their* children.  These people were ultimately grateful that someone stepped in to help them and their kids.  They were angry at the time that it happened, but intervention saves lives and keeps families together.  Do not believe the myths that socials services want to take kids away from parents.  They do this in the most extreme cases, when the child is truly at great physical risk.  They want to help the family through hard times by keeping the family together if at all possible.  Please call your local Children and Families office or your state hotline and voice your concerns.  If you want to check to see if the concerns you have are reportable in your state, based on your laws, decline to give your name at first, but provide them with the story.  You will then have the knowledge of whether the state can help in your situation.  I wish you all the best.

  • Anonymous-3

    I wish I did not love him. He is the greatest person when he is not smoking crystal. I have not called or emailed him. He verbally and mentally abused me. I still love him though. I wish I could just forget him. He says I need mental health help. He provoked me by calling me a B****. I forgave him. He does not want to communicate with me anymore. I guess he is doing me a favor by not wanting to communicate with me. I just wish I could get over him immediatley. Please pray for me I will pray for all of you. Thank you.

  • Anonymous-4

    Some one very close to me for a few years now, I have just lose due to Pot and Cocaine and as well as a new smoking addiction. This person was my best friend for thoes years I knew them If fact I still know them. Dispite seeing them less and talking to them less and less each passing day, the though and knowing, and imagining them doing them is an unforgetable though, and somthing they can never take back,Even if they quit, They still did it, and they wanted it more than you. You never know how fast it can happen again, even knowing them for multipule years, if they can leave you for it once, why not twice?

    Staring the person in the eye can be one of the hardest things you do after being through that.

    It is even harder to let them go forever, And even harder when you still love them.

    Drugs ruin lives.


    i am an adult survivor of child abuse. i have began drinking everyday and don't really understand why. i fear i am an alcoholic. it runs in my family i am a mess i know and dont understand how this has happen to me. where do i fit?

  • Anonymous-5

    addiction is my name and my game, dont know what or how to stop. I think its going to kill me. Right at this very moment I am so dope sick it isnt funny. To get my next hit is what i am looking for, someone help me

  • worried daughter

    my brother and I started noticing my mom acting kind of different..strange. and only at night. when a friend suggested I tell my dad about it, I did. He told me that he had also noticed my mom's strange behavior. Stumbling around at night, repeating the same thing over and over, being extremely worried about my brother and me. He said he would talk to her about it, and he did. This past week, he was gone on a business trip. I went into my basement to get a bottle of water out of the fridge, and found a large glass 3/4 empty with wine. Usually, my mom drinks her wine in the kitchen. That night I had a friend over, and she just had to sneak it, so she went into the basement. This struck something in me, and I became very angry and upset, and cried myself to sleep that night. the next day, I planned to talk to a guidance councelor at my school to see if she had any suggestions on what to do, but I chickened out.

    I just need to know if I should talk to my mom about it myself, tell her I've noticed, and I'm worried...or if my dad should just keep at it and I should stay out of it? I need help on what to say to her, if anything. I'm just so unsure of it all right now. I also can't talk to anyone about this, so if anyone can help, I would appreciate it so much.

  • Anonymous-6

    I look back and see all of my childhood friends and now the ones i still know or run into are all into into drugs hard. My best friend who I have known since I was born is in rehab for Heroin right now and is facing 2 to 10 years in prison, oh and he's only 18 by the way. I have tried again and again to get out of the drug culture but it runs my life, my pocketbook, my friends, and my country's economy!!! WOW if there's a God then Bless the US lol

  • Anonymous-7

    I read a message my sister sent to someone online saying 'come to my friends house, we have lots of drinkk and weed :)' and i've spoken to her about it but she said it wasn't true it musn't have been her someone must have hacked into her account, but i don't know if i can believe her because i know quite a few of the people she hangs around with definately do it. Today, she has just told me that her friends did it and there was guys there that did it for them, but i don't know if i can believe she didn't do it because she wrote it and also she's not the kind of person who would want to be left out and i know she was drinking. But if she is doing it i don't know how to stop her!?

    Please help me decide what to do



    To all out there with friends,spouses etc. with problems concerning they loved ones. Iam a survivor of a Alcoholic Father, some of my Brothers and I where also on Alcohol and Drugs and Pills, GET OUT IF YOU CAN. These People make your Life miserable by saying horrible things to you. Believe me I been there done that. I still hang around People doing the same I grew up with. WAISTING TIME. These Addicts come around when they fall rock bottom or worst when they die. Most all are severly depressed and want you to feel the same way because theY Life is messed up.I quit drinking I quit doing Drugs and quit doing Pills because I WANTED too. I got tired of living a life that way. So again for all those out there,the more you talk to these People about the problem they having the more they drink, do drugs,pop pills. DROP THEM, move on Life too short to be abused, neglected etc.IF THEY WANT TO QUIT THEY WILL if NOT pray for them,keep your Distance and dont HELP. You stress yourself out. I thank GOD everyday for my survival.No iam not cured emotional and probly never will but now I can look back and say THANK YOU GOD FOR HELPING ME. There is help out there if you want if NOT then good luck. Iam a survivor and plan on staying that way Texas

  • Anonymous-8

    Have never known anyone addicted to drugs and alcohol before until a few months ago. I agree with below post, you can only do so much but in the end the person need to WANT to change. Yet, I feel rather helpless, useless and wonder whether I did all that I could. I am so burnt out emotionally and was subjected to constant lies. I had to quit the friendship and get out.

    Drug users and alcoholics. It is such a great waste of a life. If only these people know how it affects friends and families, no only themselves. Yes I can only pray and imagine now but fear for the worse.

  • Anonymous-9

    my boyfriend told me that he needed help so i got him in a rehab program and i know its going to help him but now i am worried that he wont need me or want me when he gets out

  • Anonymous-10

    My boyfriend admits to having a drug and alcohol problem, but always renags. Asks for help, and then does the same. It gives me hope when he admits it, and asks for help, but then when I tell him I'm going to make an appointment with a Dr. or a psychologist, he tells me it's a waste of time. What can I do to help him stick to his guns and just go? It's strange, he's in denial with himself but openly admits that he's got a problem and asks for help. Does this just mean that he's not ready for a change? Or does he just not care?

  • Lorrie

    There are 4 of us. My youngest brother is a severe drug addict. My next brother in line does not believe it and believes all of our brother's lies and lame excuses. My brother claims that because he talks to our drug addicted brother daily and he states he is not on drugs, he's convinced he is not on drugs because otherwise, he would hear it in his voice!!! He keeps bailing my brother out (not jail, believe it or not he has never been arrested) but he basically supports our drug addicted brother by giving him money, letting him live in our dad's house, paying his utilities, cable, etc. My parents are deceased and I guess my brother took over for my parents as they refused to believe it also. I have sent him information and provided him locations and times to Nar-Anon meetings but he hasn't gone. Does anyone have any suggestions? Many thanks.

  • worried sister

    my sister i know is having withdrawes from pain killers locerts and sleeping pills any way they are getting harder for her to get and is is having bad withdraws what are the signs i know she has had a bad attitude towards all the family and has went off on any and everone she comes in contact with lately but says its her nerves and having a nervers breakdrown. can any one tell me more about this problem.

  • Anonymous-11

    What is Nar-Anon?

    Nar-Anon members are relatives and friends who are concerned about the addiction or drug problem of another. Nar-Anon’s program of recovery is adapted from Narcotics Anonymous and uses Nar-Anon's Twelve Steps, Twelve Traditions, and Twelve Concepts.

    Nar-Anon's Purpose

    Nar-Anon is a twelve-step program designed to help relatives and friends of addicts recover from the effects of living with an addicted relative or friend. Nar-Anon's program of recovery uses Nar-Anon's Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. The only requirement to be a member and attend Nar-Anon meetings is that there is a problem of drugs or addiction in a relative or friend. Nar-Anon is not affiliated with any other organization or outside entity.

    If you love someone who has a problem with addiction and that problem is keeping you from living a full and purposeful life, please join us to find out how to live a better way. While the addict is addicted to drugs, we become addicted to his/her chaos and often find ourselves obsessing over how best to fix them.

    We have an online forum too:

  • star Jones

    early 20's adult daughter does not want admit she is a drug addict.....Don't want to lose the baby. She cares about nothing. I am acting like the mother. She loves losers inher life. How ca I get help for her?

  • Mama of Troubled Boy

    My son has blown zeros on his breathalyzer but has at distinct times reeked of alcohol. What is he using that would smell like that and still blow a zero? Or if he is drinking, how does he blow a zero. I can't seem to find anything that has that smell when ingested besides booze.

  • Pamela

    I have been in a relationship for 3 years with an alcoholic and drug user. He works and can pay his bills when he wants to. He is afraid to be alone and he does not admit that he needs help. I have prayed and asked God to help him because I do not want to see anything happen to him. Everyone is putting the responsibility on me to keep him going.... I just cant do it. He stays gone 1-2-3 days at a time, makes excuses for time off work. The doctors must know he has a problem because they dont want to be bother. They just keep giving him medication and that s not the problem. How do I get out?

  • Anonymous-12

    In the beginning of our relationship i didnt know my boyfirend was on drugs and when I found out was when he had a violent episode!We separated for months, I was in shock at first but then became really saddened that someone so intelligent and kind could loose their life to drugs! So I prayed, alot even wrote a prayer for him! When he surfaced again (we had no contact for 4 months), then he came back he said he was going to get help, we discussed his addiction and he started to go to meetings.He was doing pretty good consistently going to meetings for over 5 moths , then an old friend came into the picture! he started running alot with him trying to live the fast life, his friend now was able to supply him with money for his habit and he started spiraling out of control! I begged him, cried, prayed but it fell on deaf ears the 'Devil' had taken over! I couldnt take the disappearing and verbal abuse and with the final awful violent outburst, I broke it off immediately 3 1/2 months ago! He kept calling begging me to take him back but I couldnt. He did call me 2 weeks ago and said he's check himself into rehab. I was happy for him but for us I dont see us getting back together, just too much water under the bridge. I hope he can beat his addiction and live a life of sobriety! I would not wish this experience on my worst enemy!! I wholeheartedly agree an addict have to want to get the help they need!!

  • paula wilson

    hi my name is paula iam a ex drug addict and iam feeling sad all the time i hade a bad accstadent 4 years ago and i dont no whats wrong with me i always cry in the mornings and im starting to feel sad all the time. i get told all the time you are a good looking girl that does not help

  • Love

    Jehovah gives you the strengh to fight the demons in your personal life,No matter what the obsticle is. No matter what you have done in your life or how many times you think of yourselves as hopeless. There is always hope for you. If you have faith even as small as a grain of sand nothing is impossible. Just Educate yourselfs in the word of God and pray to bring yourselves at peace. Then i recommend for you to apply the lessons in the bible. The bible is a book of instructions on how to live a happy and long life. Set yourselfs apart from what the world . Change your environment to where you feel you feel peace and keep yourselves busy with work and positive activities (yes the Bible even mentions this) when you are out of work.

  • Anonymous-13

    I caught my brother making a crazy concoction in my kitchen the other night. He had cooked a pill in the microwave and then put it in the freezer. I think it was oxycontin which he was trying to prepare to inject. I have known for a while that he takes them by mouth, (he says he can't quit),but did not know he was using IV. He tried to give me some BS story that you can't do them by IV, but I found recipes online that say you can by doing exactly what he was doing. I printed them off to confront him about it, but am now too afraid. Should I just stay out of it? I can't allow this type of illegal activity in my household. I have 2 children. Should I just not invite him over anymore? I don't want to ruin what little relationship we do have now. Advise please!

  • Bunny

    I am not sure where to begin. I guess with my father sense he seems to be the leader of the pack. Growing up my dad always wanted to be let’s say more of a friend then a father. He would party with me and my two older brothers. He would allow under age parties to go on and even bought the alcohol. At first I thought I had the coolest dad ever. Ever since my mom left life was just one big party all the time. As I started to notice that this can't be a good thing for a father to do with his 15 year old daughter at the time. I started to distance myself from that seen. By doing this I started to notice that there was way more to the party then I thought. My father was doing crack cocaine and a cocktail of prescription drugs plus alcohol. My oldest brother was always caught up in drinking and soon turned to cocaine the help him cope with his divorce from his wife of only 4 yrs. So he lost pretty much everything a couple of times b/c of this life style. Even his children, nothing seemed to make him stop. Rt now he seems to have stuff somewhat together but he also moved across the country so I really couldn't tell you how well everything is going for him. But I do know he is still using alcohol and drugs almost every night. My other brother that is the middle child has done ever drug under the sun. And has had a huge addiction problem. He recently got stuck on oxy. He has been in detox a few times but still goes back to the same behaviors and can't seem to keep a job or his life together. He always has an excuse about everything. When I mean excuse it is usually like a laundry list of things. If he is clean like he claims he is then why is he always broke? Why can't he keep a good paying job? And why is his girl friend always trying to leave him and take the kids? My mom and dad always bail him out of everything and send him money. All he has to do is tell them he is trying to get his life together and they fall for it every time. My father well he does drugs with my brothers every chance he can get so whatever! He does not count but my mom is a pretty level headed person. IT drives me crazy that she does not see all the giant red flags about every one!!!! I do not drink or do any drugs of any kind. I have been living with these problems for years now and it is embarrassing. I am now 26 years old. I have a 3 year old son and a little girl cooking in the oven lol. Not only does it upset me but it takes a toll on y husband sometimes. So it really hurts that I cannot share and enjoy the normal family life with my father and two older brothers. It honestly feels like there is a huge part of my life missing. With all three of them being drug addicts it makes me so upset and mad and sad at the same time. My son really does not know anything about his uncles and his grandpa. It is just so messed up and sad. I want to know is there anyone else out there that knows or can relate to my problem?

  • Anonymous-14

    my son started smoking pot from age 14yrs. said was bullyed at school. then went onto ecstacy poppoing opills, then abused alcohol. Just completed a degree. and is now a herroin addict says has been doing for 4 months living in the same family house. keeps saying wont be repeated but has and hangs around the same bunch of friends, looks in your eyes and lies, runs away from responsibilty, and is always talking about how special he is. i dont have any energy nor strength to be around him to see how wasted he is and its absolutely draining. Zero support from husband, has his own addiction problem, i feel i am trapped please help

  • Anonymous-15

    I have been drinking beer every day for the past thirty years, and have had problems with social situations, and my work history is broken.....I tend to like very big lies in order to get out of a situation that makes me feel uncomfortable....even told an employer that a family member just died so that I could leave the company and stay home and drink....well, if you find any of this similar, remember that you are an alcoholic...I should have gotten help a long time ago, and still consider myself a funtional alcoholic, but still an alcoholic.....It will continue to affect my life all the way through and after my soon to be retirement.....I have seen a few friends parents pass away well before there time by letting this go......If you are on this path stop!....esp if you are still young enough to have a successful life.....remember too that in life, we only get one!

  • -j-

    Thankyou very much to the person that posted a comment on Nov. 16th. My husband is an alcoholic and refuses to admit it. He comes home chewing gum, his eyes are blood shot and a little heavy, he can't stand straight without wobbling and is either really relaxed or ready to argue about anything. I've only been married to him since February. I grew up in a family of alcoholics and I can sure tell when he's been drinking. He'll lie and get mad when I question him. I asked him not to drink last night when his kids were here so, what does he do? He drinks BEFORE he gets home. He has pushed me on the bed before and accidentally threw a tv remote at my head (which gave me a black eye for about 3 weeks). I believe in God and believe that my hubby is capable of change THROUGH God. My human side tells me to leave, take my kids and don't look back. My Godly side says to love him, pray for him and believe for him to change. I've lived with alcoholics in the past, I really don't feel like going thru this again! My mom, dad, aunt and 2 grandfathers all died from alcoholism. Are there any Christian married women out there who can identify with me?

  • jak

    I have been married to my husband for 16 yrs, he has been drinking for 10 of those and I am a Christian woman so I can totally relate to your predicament. I have made the decision to stay with him as I have been divorced before and do not ever want to go through that again. I have been working on myself, with God's help and guidance because I know that I am with this type of man because of my own issues. The thing I am struggling with is that Joe is not a bad guy. He works (doesn't make much money), he's home(to much, he has not friends or outside life), he interacts with his kids, he loves God. So, what's my problem? He sits on the couch every night and watches TV and drinks beer, and ignores me. We have no sex, no kissing, no hugging, we don't go anywhere or do anything together. The other difficult thing is I am watching him get more out of touch with life. He does not have any interest in the things he used to do. We used to spend all our time outside in the summer, he was out on the deck maybe five times this yr. But he is not this falling down drunk like I read about so am I making a mountain out of mole hill?

  • Amanda

    I'm 15, and I just found out my older sister, 19, smoks pot. I want to talk to her about it but I don't really know what to do, or say?? I have little to no respect for people who use drugs( I lost someone who was like my older brother to a drug deal )..... I was using her phone to message our brother, and I kinda read her messages to one of her friends and she was talking about how she has just smoked a bowl of kush. I also smell it coming from her room, and found where she keeps it. How should I bring it up with her???

  • Chris

    All I can say is support your loved one, my son died 12 months ago, had I not supported him and done everything i could for him, I would be feeling guilt now. he was my baby, an alcoholic, he did not choose to have an addiction, my life is done, Mattie was my baby, I find it hard to even speak his name. How dare people say people with an addition are worthless. Live in their shoes for awhile and see how you feel

  • sarah

    my x husband is an alcholic and has been told he has swallon red blood cells and he said the dr said today that if he carries on drinking the amount he is drinking daily (6litres of strong cider) he will be dead with in 5-6 months im scared as i love him dearly we have 3 young children he left the house due to him thinking he was bi but think it was the drink to be honest what can i do ? is this right only months to live? he has been drinking alchol but not this much all the years i have been with him what can i do



  • Kyle

    I have done it all. I am also valedictorian of HS, college CS degree Cum Laude, only say it to let you know it's everyone not just someone... Life will hurt you and your inner circle of family and friends are all that can save you.... Let me please help as many as I can....

    most at the time it's not just one drug it's many. Get mad and your loved one is gone. Have an absolute policy of no acceptance and they are gone. Tell them you love them tell them you care tell them others see it and only stay quiet for reasons of their own. Just say you would like to help, 5 more will see the persons progress and follow suit, saying if he can I can.... My mom is amazing, her response was I don't believe in addiction, I don't want to help, you can figure it out, I have known for months... She tough but I can do it. Trust me the friends that say the hardest things to hear, are the ones that will see you through. No intervention, just say I care, I don't want to hurt I want to help. No judgement I'm not blind to the truth tell me on your own time and I will see you through it. God is testing you as much as the addict. Love to all

  • tash

    Hello I am a 17 year old girl who is very worried about my dad, he drinks every night this has been going on for years but he was never as bad as he is now and I'm just wondering if he is actually an alcoholic because If he doesn't get drink he gets into a mood and doesn't talk to me does that mean he's an alcoholic? I just want to know If he Is an alcoholic so I could try to help him someone PLEASE give me advice I have been going through this long enough I want my old daddy back :(



    Tasha xx

  • lily

    I met a guy 14 months ago.. we were so blowna way.. late 30's no kids not married , both had propertys and a business, fostered dogs, lovking caring and honest.. single for 4 years.. we dated I wanted to be mates.. rather be mate for life than a lover for summer.. he asked me to trust him he would never let me down..he told my family his friend and everyone around us..things were amazing,, apart from onweeknds we did drugs, okmyeah it was fun but they way he did it was extreme.but i accepted wild.

    6 weeks before he was leaving again for a new travel experience he couldnt handle leaving, on the day he flew he ended it, no explination gone,,

    hes afraid of life and love and now i see what has happened i would not have encourged drugs at all has je left cos he thinks im addict AND NO GOOD FOR HIM, HES AN ADDICT AND CANT HURT ME, OR HE SAW HOW MUCH HE CAHNGED ME AND MADE ME SICK. sorrhy hit the capital button by accident not mad just crap on this comouter. I like fun im not an addict vut maybe he is.. hes an amazing soul imstrong enough to let him go but if he returns give him my tiome to help, him if he wants it

    i love him hes a lost soul in a world that took him away but ivee never neen treated like he did and never seen a amn look so disapointed in themselves and leave the country and say no comntact.. ever.. does he think im an adict?

  • Anonymous-16

    i can understand about beind a drunk. there is something alot of times that bothers you. even if it was a long time ago. i have been there. he or they men ave no right to mean or drink more then a wekend or vacation, but they do it to get away something bothers them. mine was a girl i loved very much and couldnt hold our finances sad thing is that is all it took. everyone has there trigger. i have always felt you need to buy everything. not saying put up with it bc i wouldnt. they have to get there stuff together. support helps. being loved is amazing but it mutual. also one thing is you never will thik its you or i guess going to be u.

  • Anonymous-17

    So I lost my best friend the beginning of the year... He overdosed on heroin. I never thought I would lose him. He was the most amazing person. I can't grasp it even still. It kills me every day.

    Now my problem is this: my husband has been drinking for a while. When I met him, he never really drank before. Once we got married, we started drinking together occasionally. And he got laid off just a couple years ago. Once he got laid off, we would buy a handle of whatever was cheapest and drink together every day. We both haven't worked in a couple years. At this point, we are trying to straighten our lives out. We moved to a new city and are trying to find work. But he now needs alcohol to sleep at night. I can't sleep with him when he's drunk and he doesn't just drink a little. He gets stupid. Like last night, he fell asleep on our dogs bed and when I finally got him into bed, he kept thrashing around and fell off the bed like three times. This doesn't happen every time, but it is definitely happening more frequently. I really just don't want to lose him to addiction like I did my best friend. I'm so scared that he's going to drink too much and not wake up. I'm constantly awake making sure he's still breathing. I just don't know what to do anymore :(

  • Sammy

    Hi my name is Sammy and I think my son Anthony maybe an alcoholic...He's 20 yrs old lost his job and has been drinking almost daily is smoking weed..My son has very good friends that are doing pretty well for themselfs they are either going to school or working...My situation is that he's up all night and sleeps all day.. I come home very very disapointed he's not getting anything done...bearly looking for a job and helps clean only when i start to get upset.. Right now it's 2:56 am and im in the livingroom taking care of Anthony, I just want to make sure he doesn't choke...These last couple of weeks it's been really stressful on me... I am so worred about him just laying around..I really, really try to understand his stresses, but I dont know how to communicate with him... It always ends in an argument.. I hate it and i hate myself for not being more understanding... Please help

  • Anonymous-18

    We just recently moved from Ohio to Georgia. My boyfriend thinks everyone he talks to is his friend. I used to live in Georgia and I get tireed of telling him that nobody is his friend and criminals operate different here vs Ohio. Crimes are more white collar then in your face. He met this chic that uses drugs . She is your a typical drug addict she prtends to be interested in people just to get them to pay for her drugs. My boyfriend does not understand he needs to stopp trying to make friends with people. We had one icident where this guy who was supposedly his friend got the cops called to where we were staying twice. I have not seen him use drugs with these people but his addict behavior is showing. It is frusstrating trying to explain you may have physically quit using a substance but you need to get some sort of counsoling to discontinue the behavior associated with the past use because substance abuse does cause mental and physical problems weather they show up immediatlty or in the future. He claims he can say or do what he wants but there have been times when people have wanted to confrnt hi but I have interviened then he claims people tell him they want to fight me or whatever but they have never confronted me directly. sometimes I am afraid that he is going to get hiself killed or into a situation where he s going to get hurtbecause he won't change his behavioror even aknowledge it. I tell him we need to support each other.Everything turns into a fight or argument. He ignorees me because I lived here so long ago but people have not changed much. He thinks I need him to survive but I have been making sure the bills get paid he does not make enough money to survive on his own. He doesnt understand i don't need the headache of dealing with otheer peoples addiction.

  • daniel

    So I met this beautiful girl at my part time side job. We immediately clicked. There was just something about her that sucked me in. She made me forget all of my problems.

    After getting to know her for awhile she had told me about how she used to have a bad xanax addiction, and talked about heroin a lot but claims she has never done it herself.

    Before I ever asked her on a date, my boss, who is a personal friend informed me that she has a boyfriend who was in jail and they had a rocky relationship. This did not bother me. The chemistry was there between us. I knew she lied a lot, but the feelings were obvious to everyone.

    We had a nice fling. She told me she left her boyfriend and we've been together for four months now, and she's recently found to be pregnant. Turns out she never really left her boyfriend and has been drinking and doings "xanax" this whole time even though I think its heroin. She was for sure clean when I met her. Its this man and the drugs. He sucked her back in. I don't know what to do. She's in jail for a month right now. Got arrested stealing with him.... I don't want to quit on this girl. Not now. I once went down a similair past and walked away from the girl I was with.... she became a heroin addicted hooker. I can't quit on her. My family and hers both say she is a lost cause

    I just don't know what to do.... this really rocked my world. I know the right answers. But its so hard to walk away. I don't think I could live with myself if the day ever comes when I get that phone call saying she overdosed.... life sucks....

  • susan

    I have raised my daughters in a Christian home.It wasn't perfect.To make a long story short,My youngest daughter who is 21 has spraled out of control.she had my beautiful granddaughter at 19.daughter still wants to hang with very unhealthy and strange people that I have been told are drug addicts.I've read her e-mails and she denies everything.her haands are swollen twice the size,she's sick all the time,sleeps all day,and now never hardlycomes home or calls .her x-boyfriend is in jail for drugs i know.she denies that too.these people are wrecking her life but she picks the worst.

  • Anonymous-19

    I'm really scared and worried. My father doesn't come home to sleep sometimes and drinks constantly. I followed him to the restroom the other night and noticed he took foil paper and a lighter with him. He had the water running so we wouldn't hear what he was doing but I heard him lighting up something. I think he is doing heroine??? I seriously don't know what to do..I talked to him and told him that I knew what he was doing in the restroom but all he did was deny it. I love him to death and don't know what i'd do if anything happened to him. HELP?!! :(

  • Anonymous-20

    My daughter has a new boyfriend for 8 months now. During this time I have seen her go downhill quickly as far as parenting and personal health. I just reviewed the signs above. She fits 15 of them. I can't get her away fromt this guy. I have my grandson safe and sound. They are smoking something because I kept smelling on my grandson's clothes and belongings. My daughter won't find work, sleeps through the day and thinks her now "fiance" is a great guy because he doesn't care if she works or not. The guys parents are distributing prescription drugs to them, as well. I have heard morphene, vicotene, high dose of xanax and more. This guy is obsessed with my daughter and in my opinion is keeping her drugged and not working to keep her. He instantly tried claiming a father status too. He is bad news...I am not sure what to do.

  • Anonymous-21

    my draughter is on cocaine about 5 months she left her 5 years old and all her family she meet a lad just before christmas and left her family home just after christmas day lost her job car next not been to see her son l dont know what to do our family as never been around drugs so we dont have any idear what to do it my grandson l feel sorry for