Rachel is a Licensed Social Worker and has been a therapist in private practice in New York City for 17 years. Rachel Moheban gleaned two
Building and sustaining a relationship takes effort and most successful couples that have been together long enough so that the initial fairy tale rush of love and lust has dissipated (just a wee bit), know that a healthy relationship is a balancing act that requires both parties to engage in ongoing give and take.
Some of the following tips don’t seem like “rocket science” and they’re not. What they are is effective so put aside any and all skepticism and try out these ideas:
Be appreciative. No really, show your love and appreciation on a consistent basis and not just on holidays, birthdays and when you “want something.” Feeling appreciated is a basic human need and sometimes in the mad rush that comprises our days, we forget that a simple “thank you” or a special little gift (for no real reason at all) or simply carving out a little extra time for each other can sweeten even the best of relationships.
Know how to disagree. C’mon, even the happiest of couples will occasionally disagree about something and regardless if the issue is big or small, HOW you disagree can make all the difference in the world. You can disagree about a situation or topic; you don’t belittle or attack the other person’s views or opinions. Done in the correct manner, you can disagree on important issues and still maintain a loving and supportive relationship.
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Communication is key. The couples that have the best relationships know how to communicate and take (or make) the time to do so. The open lines of communication where they can share their thoughts, dreams, fears, aspirations and more helps to keep partners actively involved in each other’s lives.
Have fun. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the day-to-day grind that we simply forget about what attracted us to our partner in the first place and what fun we “used” to have. Take a fun break or better yet make that fun break a weekly habit.
Let’s face it; we all want to be involved in a healthy relationship. It just feels good and the positive feelings that such a relationship evokes helps us to withstand some of the more stressful aspects of our lives.
But once again, there’s no way around it…you have to work at it. A satisfying partnership (personal OR work!) can be a transient thing UNLESS you put in the effort.
But ask anyone who is involved in a healthy, happy and loving relationship; it is so well worth it.
Keep Reading By Author Rachel Moheban-Wachtel, LCSW
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