Tying it All Together: Why Does Someone Become Suicidal?

Ad Disclosure: Some of our recommendations, including BetterHelp, are also affiliates, and as such we may receive compensation from them if you choose to purchase products or services through the links provided

We have already discussed risk factors/vulnerabilities and triggers that may lead someone to commit suicide. Researchers have tried to weave these risk factors and triggers into a coherent picture of the reasons why someone who attempts or commits suicide. Suicide is not a simple behavior, therefore, the explanations are complex and composed of different layers of factors. Most researchers and clinicians agree that suicide is the result of the interplay between psychological, biological, and sociological factors. Each these factors does not occur in isolation, but interacts with and influences the others. Some research suggests that there may even be subtle differences between people who attempt suicide and those who complete it.

Psychological Contributions


Psychodynamic Explanations

Traditional psychodynamic theories are based on the idea that mental illness and problems result from internal, unconscious conflicts. Freud (the originator of psychodynamic theories) thought that suicidal and homicidal behavior were two sides of a similar coin. He suggested that we have two basic drives; one oriented toward love and life (called Eros), and one oriented toward death (Thanatos). Freud suggested that people who function adaptively are able to balance and integrate these drives. So, for instance, a healthy person would be able to engage in loving relationships and wide array of stimulating and growth-oriented activities, yet pull back from the world (and other people) when it is necessary to conserve physical and psychic (mental) energy. In contrast, if these drives are unbalanced, a person's destructive impulses may surface, resulting in violence against others (i.e., homicide) or violence against oneself (i.e., suicide).

Therapists are Standing By to Treat Your Depression, Anxiety or Other Mental Health Needs

Explore Your Options Today


Object relations theorists (one of the contemporary psychodynamic theories) suggest that people can become suicidal or homicidal as a result of a difficult early relationship with a caregiver object (another person (e.g., a parent) as represented in memory). The inappropriate relationship leads to a fear of engulfment (i.e., being completely overtaken by the object) or abandonment (i.e., being completely abandoned or rejected by the object). This fear leads to an internal conflict that can become so intense that people seek a method to relieve it. Sometimes, this release is achieved by harming someone else, or themselves.

Cognitive-Behavioral Explanations

Cognitive-behavioral theories suggest that people become suicidal because they have learned to think and behave in characteristic and unhelpful ways that make suicide seem like an appropriate choice and/or coping strategy. According to these theories, how suicidal people think about stressful situations (rather than the stressors themselves) will predict how they will react to them. Both maladaptive thought patterns (called cognitive distortions) and inappropriate behavior (or a lack of skills/behavior) can propel someone toward harming themselves. It's a "chicken and egg question" in terms of which comes first. For some people, a characteristic thinking style, present very early on (see our discussion below on temperament), leads to unhelpful behavior. For others, specific behaviors and the resulting feedback (or consequences) leads to maladaptive thoughts.

Cognitive distortions that can potentially lead to suicide include:

  • Dichotomous thinking- portraying oneself and the world in black and white (e.g., thinking "my life is completely horrible", rather than "I, like everyone else, have good and not so good aspects of my life/situation/self").
  • Overgeneralization -assuming that one bad event means that the whole day (week, year, etc.) will be bad.
  • Minimization -the "flip side" of overgeneralization; assuming that a good trait or event is unimportant or "a fluke" (e.g., I did well on that presentation, but it's only because no one was paying attention to me).
  • Selective Attention -focusing only on negative information or information that confirms other negative or unhelpful thoughts (e.g., thinking "I can't do anything right" and then reviewing your week for only those things that you messed up on, rather than also considering the things you did well).

As discussed previously, one particular way of thinking raises a serious red flag with regards to suicidal behavior. People may become (or are currently) suicidal if they feel hopeless- or that things will never get better.

Behavior that can potentially lead to suicide includes skill deficits and maladaptive coping styles. For example, people who have never learned to be appropriately assertive (a skill deficit) may repeatedly be taken advantage of or lose out on important opportunities such as job promotions, meeting new friends, etc. These behaviors may lead to one of the cognitive distortions described above (e.g., dichotomous thinking; such as thinking "I am a total loser because I can't make friends").

Research also suggests that suicidal individuals often have not learned appropriate coping styles. Coping styles/skills describe how well someone can manage a stressful situation, as well as regulate their emotional, physiological, behavioral, and cognitive reactions to stressors. Active coping styles include planning/problem solving, seeking and utilizing social support, and reinterpreting (i.e., finding meaning and benefit from adverse events). Suicidal individuals use fewer active coping strategies and more avoidant (passive) coping styles such as suppression (i.e., avoiding or denying the stressor) and blaming oneself for the cause of events. In addition, those suicidal people who try to be more active in solving problems tend to rely on an impulsive method than a more logical and methodical process.

Unhelpful behaviors and thoughts often intertwine in a particularly maladaptive state referred to as "learned helplessness." Individuals in this state have a style of thinking referred to as an "internal locus of control." People with this pattern of viewing the world tend to think that negative life events are caused by internal (i.e., from me), stable (i.e., not changeable), and pervasive causes. In other words, bad things happen, they are completely my fault, and I can't change them or prevent them from happening. People who show learned helplessness "give up trying" and use passive coping skills, believing that they can't impact negative outcomes or control their moods. An internal locus of control and learned helplessness can lead to pervasive feelings of hopelessness; which again, is often a trigger for suicidality.

Additional Resources

As advocates of mental health and wellness, we take great pride in educating our readers on the various online therapy providers available. MentalHelp has partnered with several thought leaders in the mental health and wellness space, so we can help you make informed decisions on your wellness journey. MentalHelp may receive marketing compensation from these companies should you choose to use their services.

MentalHelp may receive marketing compensation from the above-listed companies should you choose to use their services.