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Dating Articles, Research, And Resources

Katelynne Shepard
Last updated:
Erin L. George, MFT
Erin L. George, MFT
Medical editor

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What Is Dating?

The definition of dating has changed with time and can still differ from culture to culture. In modern-day America, the term "dating" is often used to refer to two people in a romantic relationship. (1) In some places, people date with the express intent of seeing if the two people are a good fit for marriage, and called "courting."

When people are in the dating process, they spend time together getting to know each other. This includes talking about interests, hobbies, and family backgrounds. The intention of dating is to get a deeper understanding of the other person and determine whether there's potential for a relationship.

The relationship could be short-term or long-term, casual or serious, and it is up to the people involved to determine what they want. After all, everyone has different dating desires and expectations.

Dates can range from meeting up for coffee or going to dinner and a movie to taking a class together or going for a hike. Some people prefer to go on individual dates with just the other person, but others may participate in group dates where an entire group goes out together. Group dates may be more casual and less intimidating.

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Types of Dating

Because the definition of dating depends so much on the culture and people involved, there can be almost limitless types and subtypes of dating. Below are three basic categories that most dating relationships can fit into: (2)

  • Serious: Serious dating is when both parties are dating with the intention of a deeper future relationship. This often leads to marriage, but it does not always have to. Many serious dating relationships are monogamous, but some may also fall into the ethical non-monogamy category below. In serious relationships, building intimacy is the primary goal.
  • Casual: Casual dating is when both people aren't looking for anything serious and are just spending time with someone they like. These relationships can be purely physical with no intention of a long-term emotional connection, but it is also common for people to casually date in the beginning stages of their relationship before they decide to commit to a more serious one.
  • Ethical non-monogamy: Ethical nonmonogamy is a blanket term that describes relationships where one or both people involved are also seeing other people. Both people are aware of other relationships and have expressly consented to the arrangement. (3)

Tips for Dating

Dating can be intimidating, but there are ways to make it easier and more comfortable, like taking time to develop an appropriate dating mindset. Here are a few dating tips that can help: (2)

  • Being authentic: It is normal for someone to want to put on the best version of themselves when meeting someone new; there's nothing inherently wrong with that. But no one should feel like they must change themselves or hide interests or parts of their personality to make them more "dateable." Staying true to who they are and being open and honest can help those interested in dating have a more positive experience and increase the chances of finding someone who appreciates them for who they really are.
  • Not revealing too much information too soon: There are people who date with nefarious intentions or misrepresent themselves in order to get closer to certain people. It's important to let a relationship grow organically and not give away too much early on in the relationship. For example, some predators use dating apps to find single parents as a way to gain access to their children.
  • Getting outside opinions: It is easy to ignore red flags in the early stages of a relationship. Everything is new and exciting, and someone may be more likely to excuse away something a partner did instead of seeing it as a warning sign. Having a few friends or close family members to confide in can ensure that the person in the dating scene can get honest feedback from people who love them and want the best for them.
  • Having a list of target qualities: Before jumping into the dating game, it is helpful to make a list of qualities that are important in a partner. The other person does not have to check all these boxes to be a match, but it can provide an objective filter to ensure a potential partner meets the major criteria.

The Best Dating Sites and Apps

There are plenty of online dating apps in existence, but they are not all created equally. The right app depends on what kind of partner and relationship someone is looking for and how they prefer to communicate. Of course, there are pros and cons to online dating to be aware of as well. Here are a few of the most popular dating websites: (4)

  • Hinge: This app is tailored toward people who want to be in a serious relationship eventually. Users can connect with singles in their area. Additionally, if they pay for the premium version, they can filter out matches based on height, political affiliation, religion, and how far away they are.
  • Tinder: One of the original mainstream dating apps, Tinder is most commonly used to find casual relationships. (5)
  • Bumble: Bumble puts a twist on traditional dating apps by only letting women make the first move. Both sides can swipe and match, but once a match is made, it is up to the woman to start the conversation. Some users prefer this, as it limits the influx of messages many women get when signing up for a dating app. (6)
  • eharmony: This app takes a different approach to dating and claims to be able to scientifically match users based on compatibility. Users take a fairly lengthy quiz when signing up and then are able to view their most compatible matches and start conversations.
  • Happn: Happn is similar to other dating apps in that it lets you connect with local singles. Only those who mutually like each other can chat, and the app encourages video dates before the real-life version to ensure that everyone is on the same page and is who they say they are.
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