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Disconnected

Question:

I recently returned home from a long time abroad and have found resettling a challenge. Initially I thought it would just take time and being pro active in creating a healthy body and full new life but rather that improve it has steadily gotten worse in the last two months. Recently my feeling have become far worse, I feel completely disconnected from the people around me as if am playing a role, even receiving good news – like a new job did not make me feel good. If anything I was upset that the phone call woke me early, disturbing my time of peace! This and similar situations leave me feeling terribly self indulgent and guilty that I can’t even appreciate blessings which of course makes me feel worse. I can’t concentrate and or retain simple information. I feel on edge like at any moment something will give or break for lack of a better description – the whole experience is quite frightening. Do you believe this may be a normal response that can be improved without drug therapy? What can I do to feel better?

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Answer:

What you are experiencing is the sense of having landed here after living on planet Mars for a long time. You are totally disoriented and that is accounting for you symptoms. It is really important that you be patient with your self and give your self time to acclimatize yourself to life at home after many years away from here.

In moving back home you are also mourning the place or places where you lived before. The people, climate, time zone, food, relationships and everything you became attached to are not easy to give up. We often speak of "time lag" in moving rapidly through time zones. But, the same concept is at work when we move and live around the globe.

As part of the mourning your are going through is depression and the depression brings with it irritability and anger. You are also experiencing a kind of "cognitive disonance" living at home now. That accounts for your feeling isolated or "disconnected." In fact, not only are you in mourning for the loss of where you were, but, you are out of "synch" with home.

What to do:

1. Your instincts are telling you that you need a lot of sleep and that is correct.
2. If it is practical, I would suggest you delay starting a new job until you start to feel more connected.
3. Eat good food and get plenty of exercise. Running is an excellent way to reduce some of the intensity you are experiencing, if you are healthy enough. If you are in doubt, please see your Medical Doctor and get a check up.
4. A medical check is probably a good idea anyway, given all the adjustments you are making.
5. Meditation or yoga are good things to get involved in. They will help you to reduce some of the stress you are feeling.

At this point I doubt that you need medication. However, if these problems persist, you could think about consulting a psychologist.

Again, be patient with yourself and remind yourself that you have returned from many years on Mars.

Good Luck

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