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Jekyll & Hyde


My husband of 14 yrs is unpredictable. He has angry outbursts over nothing, picks at me, and makes mountains out of mole hills. He always hides his behavior around other people and puts on a show of being lovey-dovey with me. He is a Jekyll-Hyde. I feel as if I’m on a rollercoaster. What’s his problem and what should I do?

This Disclaimer applies to the Answer Below
  • ‘Anne’ is the pseudonym for the individual who writes this relationship advice column.
  • ‘Anne’ bases her responses on her personal experiences and not on professional training or study. She does not represent herself to be a psychologist, therapist, counselor or professional helper of any sort. Her responses are offered from the perspective of a friend or mentor only.
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Many people don’t like to indicate to their friends, co-worker, and peers that their lives are anything short of perfect. This could explain your husband’s actions around other people. But, his actions with you need to be discussed. Explain to him that you feel as if you are on an “emotional rollercoaster” and that in addition to your own hurt feelings, you are worried about what is going on in his life to cause him to act so unpredictably. Hopefully, he will open up to you. Your husband quite honestly may not realize that his behavior is hurting you as well as confusing you. Has something happened recently that might account for his actions? Is he going through a stressful time? Could this be his way of letting you know that something is upsetting him and he wants you to ask about it? When he gets angry with you and picks on you, is it about the same thing all the time — or different things? Do your best to try and get him to open up. It’s the only way you will know for sure what is causing his behavior. Best of luck to you, – Anne

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