I’m a fourteen year old female and I’m having trouble talking to my mom about my 16 year old boyfriend. She totally disapproves. But it’s not like he’s someone she’s never met before. She grew up with his family and I did too. She thinks that he’s going to pressure me into doing something that I don’t want to but I already talked about that and my boyfriend said that a girl shouldn’t be pressured into doing something that she doesn’t feel right about. She just won’t talk with me about it. It’s either her way or no way. Can you give me some advice on what to do?
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Fourteen is a difficult age – You are adult enough to have desires and child enough to need the limits and guidance that a good parent can provide. It would be a shame if your mother were unable to provide you with such guidance. My advice is to continue to try to talk with your mother about your relationship. It will be important for you to learn more specifically what it is about your being in a relationship that concerns her so. See if you can pacify her concerns by coming up with a responsible plan that you and she both agree will keep you safe. If all attempts to talk with mom fail, I hope you will consider following her wishes and toning it down with your boyfriend. At your age boyfriends will come and go. You will only have one mother in your life. If you can’t talk with her, and you won’t cool it down with your boyfriend, then at least make sure you educate yourself about sexuality, pregnancy and birth control, and how to prevent sexually transmitted disease. You can get yourself into a lot of trouble when you don’t take the right precautions. Good luck to you, – Anne