I am easily aggravated, I hit things. I can’t seem to concentrate on anything. I’ve always had a temper, but not so quick nor obvious to others. I can’t sleep and if I do if i’m woken up I get angry and take it out on people that don’t deserve it. I’m not sure what to do, i’m unhappy with myself and others are finding it hard to be near, but I don’t blame them.
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The first thought that comes to my mind as I read your E. Mail is depression. Certainly, anger, irritability, difficulty sleeping and unhappiness are classic symptoms of depression.
In addition to depression there may be some other problems because you report that you have always had a bad temper.
I suggest that you get your self into psychotherapy as well as on anti depressant medication. The medication would alleviate some of the symptoms of depression. I use the term "some of the symptoms" because your bad temper preceded this depression and you need to learn how to control your control and make healthier use of your temper.
The type of therapy I would suggest is Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy because that would help you learn more about your patterns of thinking that are the root of you depression. In addition, you will learn how to modify your thinking patterns to help you avoid and control both depression and anger.I want to emphasize that both medication and therapy are important to you for both your mental and physical health. It is a fact that temper, anger and arguing cause blood pressure to rise, adrenalin to flow and cholesterol to be pumped out into the arteries. Later in years these problems accumulate and lead to strokes, heart attacks and death.
It is in your best interests to get help now and learn how better to adjust and control your moods.In addition to psychotherapy and medication I would suggest regular exercise and getting into meditation as well as yoga and Tai Chi.