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Unhappy And In Therapy

Question:

I am currently in therapy, I have discovered that I am entremely codependent and suffer from awful depression, low self-esteem. I was abandoned by my mother when I was 13 and lived with my alcoholic father until I married. I married a workaholic, we have been married 17 years and in all that time I have fought tooth and nail for every minute of attention for the children or myself. I hate myself and feel worthless. I need real help any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

This Disclaimer applies to the Answer Below
  • ‘Anne’ is the pseudonym for the individual who writes this relationship advice column.
  • ‘Anne’ bases her responses on her personal experiences and not on professional training or study. She does not represent herself to be a psychologist, therapist, counselor or professional helper of any sort. Her responses are offered from the perspective of a friend or mentor only.
  • Anne intends her responses to provide general information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
  • Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
  • No correspondence takes place.
  • No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by ‘Anne’ to people submitting questions.
  • ‘Anne’, Mental Help Net and CenterSite, LLC make no warranties, express or implied, about the information presented in this column. ‘Anne’ and Mental Help Net disclaim any and all merchantability or warranty of fitness for a particular purpose or liability in connection with the use or misuse of this service.
  • Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.
Answer:

The real help you need you should already be getting — in therapy. Only through the help of a guide — a professional therapist –and other appropriate treatment (depression is often treated with medications as well), will you eventually feel better. But therapy is a process, not an instant cure. It helps you learn how to build yourself back up into the person you know, somewhere deep down in your heart, you are. It helps you learn new coping skills, and build upon your relationships with others. It takes time and patience on your part, and a willingness to change, learn new things, and put into practice the new things you learn. Good luck! Take care, – Anne

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