Recognizing Anger Signs

Before you learn the techniques to manage your emotions, you first need to learn to recognize your anger. You need answers to questions like:

  • "How do I know when I am angry?"
  • "What events/people/places/things make me angry?"
  • "How do I react when I'm angry?"
  • "How does my angry reaction affect others?"

Answering these questions takes a while. It is likely you can rattle off several things that make you angry. You might even be able to identify several signs that you exhibit when you are angry (e.g., clenched fists, etc.). These quick answers are only the beginning, however; the low hanging fruit. You will want to continually ask yourself these questions for a period of time before you can be satisfied that you are fully knowledgeable about your personal anger.

Recognizing Physiological Signs of Anger

The first step in effective anger management is to learn how to recognize when you are angry. Some angry people see their emotions as a black or white state—they are either raging mad or they are calm. In reality, anger is not black and white, but rather quite gray. Anger occurs on a continuum between rage and calm where most of the time people experience some gradation of anger between these two extremes.

The same people who tend to see anger in terms of extremes sometimes have difficulty recognizing when they are experiencing intermediate anger states. Luckily, most people experience a number of physical, emotional and behavioral cues that they can use to let them know when they are becoming upset.

Some physical signs of anger include:

  • clenching your jaws or grinding your teeth
  • headache
  • stomach ache
  • increased and rapid heart rate
  • sweating, especially your palms
  • feeling hot in the neck/face
  • shaking or trembling
  • dizziness

Emotionally you may feel:

  • like you want to get away from the situation
  • irritated
  • sad or depressed
  • guilty
  • resentful
  • anxious
  • like striking out verbally or physically

Also, you may notice that you are:

  • rubbing your head
  • cupping your fist with your other hand
  • pacing
  • getting sarcastic
  • losing your sense of humor
  • acting in an abusive or abrasive manner
  • craving a drink, a smoke or other substances that relax you
  • raising your voice
  • beginning to yell, scream, or cry
Comments
  • Beth

    I think i am a very angry person. I experience a lot of the signs of anger and think i need to get help but i am embaressed!!

  • Anonymous-1

    Dear Beth:

    There is no need to feel embarissed about how you are feeling.

    Chances are the symptoms you are just starting to recognizing, others around you have allready seen.

  • D

    I think that bravery needs to be commended. The ground breakers who come forward and share their own pain and embarrassment probably don't realize the positive effect they have on other people who are suffering in silence. I'm one of those people. I think that I'm getting to be old hat at admitting my shortcomings too. I am so glad for the role models I have had in my life. People have a tendency to think that role models are those people who climb Mt. Everest or who slay a dragon. But for me and many like me role models are those people who have been brave, stepped up and made themselves vulnerable and the ripple effect of that bravery is that it resonates with others and they are able to also come forward and share their story or take whatever steps are necessary to recovery. Bravo.

  • vicky

    i think i have anger management all i ever feel is anger and frustration by anything anyone does even if its the tinyest things like burning my toast or about the tv. my palms start to sweat and alli want to do is punch somthing or throw somthing i normal clecnh my fists or hold on to somthing really tightly. if anyone trys to talk tome i jut sceam and shout and in there faces and i some times cry, my voice always gets loudr and more angryer, even if there being nice. my parents just thin is my age and the hormones as im 16 but i just cant cope im getting annoyed so easiy

  • ANGRY MOM

    Why the hell do i feel this way? everytime i talk to my husband i get so angry. i cant bear to listen to him anymore. today i told him to go f*ck himself and i meant it. i've already been to jail for simple battery. i jsut wanna know what the hell do i do to make these feelings go away. i have a one year old little girl and she does not deserve to go through this.

  • Ainurandur

    I'm so angry at these bots at L2 because they don't care about my feelings. I'm so gay... Can you give me hugs or something?

    Ainurandur

  • alan

    i think i have a really bad anger issue and it just costed me my girlfriend to break up with me because when we argrue i get so pissed i start to shake and i just yell and i always punch things i want help so bad but i dont know where to go to get it. i just want it to go away

  • Anonymous-2

    I am known as the 'crazy bitch' to some people, others a very kind, lighthearted younglady. I have a history of anger problems in my family, and severe mental illnesses. Schizophrenia is apparently present in a bit of my family. For instance, I have attacked people with knives while drinking, and attempted to destroy people - I'm also known as the hippie girl. I am so bipolar, i don't know what to do with myself... I have such horrible rage that I feel I must smoke pot just to calm my nerves and slow my heart b4 I do something stupid. For instance, just tonight - Someone stole money from me....So I went on a crazy chase across town to threaten them, they told me where I could find my money, after that They were being rude to me ( unappreciated ) - So i went to my boyfriends vehicle (his friend) and stole their beer. (the boy is underage, so he got quite pist) - ne waysl....I threw it out somewhere and another high speed chase began down the back roads, and when I backed up over a huge stopper for parking, my boyfriends began to punch at my vehicle, and i hauled ass away, his brother went to jail for that shit...so he realized his feelings were getting in the way and stopped. I was yelling at my best friend ( the girl i was with) - sweetest thing can't even talk back....I found out she told them all where the beer was...and I went fucking ballistic...- i yanked her door open and told her just what a fucking piece of shit bitch she was, and how she had lost the only girlfriend she had...and only dumb cunts who don't know how to live a life betray real friends....I also shoved her across the street because i thought she stole my joint (she didn't) - My boyfriend had to contain me in a strong hold, this made me start shaking and crying, b/c i was defensless and i couldnt fight...I also kicked him several times, even once in the balls....he somehow handled me....and i was banished from his friends house.....He got drunk, and pretty much said we couldn't be together, he jus cannot deal with it ne more (we've been dating 2 years) - The night b4 i told him he was a fuck up piece of shit, and he didn't deserve me....I also raced away from my house, screaming at my parents that i was going to go shoot up heroin and blh blah,,,,fuck off, yada yada......(i felt as tho they were accusing me of drug use) - Then I almost hit my dad when he ran in front of me to stop me....He has insane anger, and just cannot stop once it starts, and i do too.....I start shaking and my brain like shuts off,,,,it all gets blury, and i just don't fucking care about ne thing....I think I destroyed 2 relationships tonight, just bc i was full of rage and vengance over nothing.......i'n only 18, and i am a sweet girl usually.....I always tell people to be nice, and i am so kind to everyone, until i feel you've crossed me, then i loose it....It's like i let it build and have fits of rage every few months....My friend says i'm lucky i'm not in jail right now....? what should i do?

  • Dim

    What a fantastic article!

    I've already calmed down a bit while reading it, because it helped me understand what is happening to me with anger outbursts. I have a lot of anger outbursts and i hate it as i hate myself too. Some times I want to break everything up with a baseball bat. Other times I'm biting my hands or punching my thighs, pulling my hair or wanting to slam my head on the wall, or punch myself in the face. It's a terrible, horrific situation. I totally hate it. I feel so sorry for my poor wife that has to endure me. Also I see that me 2 year old daughter is starting to yell and looks very angry some times. Am I doing this to her? Probably. My mother used to be very angry and had outbursts. I'm seeing myself doing the same things she did. I don't want my kids to become like me. But i'm motivated now and will take action, today!

  • Irma P

    I salute all of you who have bravely shared insights and experiences regarding this "dark side" of human nature. We all manifest varing degrees of anger. Clearly, some have it far worse than others. My former boyfriend is one such person. He's a brilliant, handsome and passionate man. And, in his deepest heart, he is a truly good person. But, he is also a "stick of dynamite" with a fuse could go off at any given moment. It was a constant struggle being in his company as his outbursts were both frightening and embarassing. My quiet, passive nature along with my patience and loving support, couldn't offset his reactions or, I should say, his "over-reactions." And, upon reflection, he had warned me early in our relationship "... dump me before you hate me..." I never fully grasped his meaning until now. So, those of you who care to sustain and maintain your relationships... your deeply meaningful and necessary human contacts... get help! My boyfriend won't... "I like myself," he says. But, he is now, alone... with his "dark side" while, I am free and into the light.

  • Anonymous-3

    My husband work all day and night. I have over my shoulders the house and the kids. He doesn't help in anything at all. So, I have become anger and anger over the last year. I have been aggressive with my husband physically. I want to get help but my husband doesn't give the support that I need. He keeps saying that my problem is that I can handle two kids. He doesn't understand that the problem is that my angry is affective everybody in the household and WE have a couple WE need professional help.

  • Anonymous

    Okay - so I'm a 27 year old woman....I have worked in a large company for 3 years before just recently getting laid off. I have an anger problem....but on a regular day, I'm a very easy-going, happy person that is independent, strong-willed and fairly positive. I love helping people with their own problems and seem very good at it...but can't seem to help myself.
    My anger is only present in front of those i feel very comfortable with. Perhaps this is why I have been able to lead a normal life. Most of it stems from arguments with my brother. He is 2 years younger than me and because he is a male, he's always had special treatment from my parents and I've grown to resent him for it. I actually feel a lot of pain and frustration when I am angry....probably far more than the people enduring it. He calls me crazy every time we have any sort of disagreement and this escalates my rage when initially it may not have been as present....he seems to know this triggers my outbursts, but seems to want me to get upset. When i get upset, it makes him look better in front of my parents and any other people that may be present. I often wonder what type of brother would do such a thing to his older sister that obviously could use some help....maybe not from him since he seems to be one of the triggers, but from somewhere,....and if ur making fun of someone that desperately needs help, how good of a person can you be really?
    Anyway - all I want to do is get better....it's for my own good, my own health, my own sanity....and I just don't know what to do. I am at a loss because I know I am better than this....frustrated beyong belief....I feel like one of these days I am just going to stop trying to better myself and jus accept the "dark side" of myself....embrace it and learn to live with it....alone of course cause no one needs to deal with this other than me...*cry*

  • Nana.

    hey. I'm in 9th grade, i'm, pretty sure i have anger issues... but i can't control them... i dont take things out on other people, that's something i would never do, that's not right... but today i got highlighter wrote on me and i got really mad and threw the marker at the guy that threw it at me and slapped him in the face... then this girl that was having problems with her boyfriend... or whatever was taking her anger out on me, and im like, "you need to relax!!" and she's like, "if you dont know whats going on then dont say crap!" im like, "you take your problems out on everyone else and you expect them to be all happy with you!!!!!" and shes like, (out of no where) "i'm not the one obsessing over someone that has a girlfriend!!!!" cuz i like this guy... and im like, "WHERE DOES THAT EVEN COME FROM!?!?!?!" and i thought i was gonna hit her... but idk what to do with myself anymore... i've tried walking out... handleing it that way.. and it works... but i think i need to take classes... my dad has anger issues too... so it could come from him... and i clench things when im mad... so like i ripped my notebook... :|
    and idk... what to do...

    can you help?

  • Anonymous-4

    know i have anger issues and it comes from my parents death and people lying to me alll the time i am so sick of being angry its really starting to get to me i just wish i could go to sleep and not wake up and i dont want to feel that way its so hard when it seems like NO ONE int he world understands you i have been to counseling before it didnt help at all im still upset and its starting to effect my health the way i think im really scared im going to do something i will regret for the rest of my life but i am so sick of people!

  • Ashley W.

    I am in 8th Grade, almost out of school for summer, and there are people who will do the dumbest things, or say something or do something to me or a friend/boyfriend and I will be triggered right there, I will clench my teeth, my face turns red from what my friends and parents say,I clench my fists, I get random heat flashes on my face and neck and under arms,I've been having a sweating problem, I might starting crying, I will want to scream or slap them, and I am thinking in my head to do something, slap him, or scream at them even though I am in class, I get triggered sooo easily, and my friend Maggie noticed when I get irritated, I stomp my feet, and have a small panic attack. I read this article and I relate to all of those identifications, does this mean I do have Anger problems, if I do, how do I stop it, I don't want to hurt anyone, but I just flip out and go on a rampage sometimes....Help!

  • well(8)

    okaay, so april has been a pretty crappy month for me.and YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?! well there's this girl, who claims we're " BEST FRIENDS " ughh. NO. so my ex. bf asked her to grad. she told me she was 'takeing my feelings into consideration" then why the f*ck would you say yes? I'll continuen this later. bye !

  • amilyn

    i'm 8th month pregnant and emotinally unstable.i'm living at my parents house now just for delivery.the problem is they let my 9 year old niece to stay in our house,which i hated most.honestly,i hate her.i don't have the power to appreciate her.i don't want her to stay in our house.i gets irretated because every people in our house except my youngest brother don't even understand my situation.I'm so stressed living with someone you don't like.this is my first baby and thier first grandchild.they just ignore my feeling instead,they consider that bundle of miseries feelings rather than mine.they don't even bothered if it affects me or my baby.

    right now i'm sitting in my room having hardtimes,i have a backpain and my tummy really hurts.i just want her to disapper and be vanished.i want her to go to thier own house with her family.i don't want her to stay with us and be a burden for me.i'm so sorry i can't take her anymore!!!i need someone to rescue me.....

  • Collin

    I’m 21, and am 1 of 4 siblings in my family.. My parents got divorced 11 years ago and ever since I could remember, my dad has had an anger problem.. He runs a national business, he’s very hyperactive, and loves to help people especially financially.. If you met my dad, he appears to be very nice and fun to go out with but you can’t let him fool you. He would love to get a chance to help you in any way shape or form to “show off” it seems.. what he’s really doing is kind of setting a trap almost.. He has taken everyone in his personal life and bribed them with money and a job making it sound like the perfect lifestyle having lots of vacations and ect: but the thing is that he uses it against people in the future, he feels that we don’t give him what he deserves in return.. therefore he gets angry.. very angry.. it’s not just that, that makes him mad but its everything. He’s like a perfectionist and if something is not done his way, he blows up once he blows up, he screams so loud, cursing, accusing, making fun of people, threatens our jobs… he’s the most controlling person I know.. if we mention anything about him getting mad or about how he needs to deal with stress differently,, it gets worse.. Nobody wants to try and help him because, we all work for him.. My brother who is almost 20 just got out of the hospital of 5 days suffering from depression and anxiety which I believe was caused by my dad from getting yelled at all his life for everything.. Since then, my dad still yells at him and makes fun of him for his anxiety, him being a loser, not helping my dad in certain things which is the worst thing to do to someone that is suffering from depression and anxiety.. especially to your son. He’s the scariest person on the planet.. I start shaking every time he starts to call me on the phone or is on his way in to work..I think it’s a mix of like bi polar disorder, anger management, anxiety.. My grandpa suffered from depression and was a very angry man in his younger years as well.. Somebody please help me and tell me what to do.. how to approach him with help.. He’s killing all of us slowly especially himself.. He’s been the main reason why are family is growing further away from each other.. Please let me know what I have to do.. I’m begging.

  • Kelly H

    I had an angry father and mother. My dad was an alcholic and through many years of therapy and reading I was finally able to let go of reacting to this anger. One thing i have learned is that when people are angry all the time it is their own life they are angry with. Their own decisions and what they consider failures, injustices and abuse or learned behavior. You will have to figure out which one it is. If your father was raised with an angry man, chances are it is the only language he speaks. When the only tool you have is a sledgehammer - then everything looks like a nail. What you need to realize is that you do not have to put up with this anger. You have a right to say you do not want to be treated that way. You will not put up with it. You deserve respect. There are many very good books to read on this subject and if you crack one open might find it is the best help you could ever find to help you understand the problem and the best way to deal with it. You could hold a family intervention and confront these issues in a healthy way. It is possible to be nice and honest with him, but firm and assertive. You can tell him you are doing this because you love him, its bad for his health, and you desire a better relationship with him. He may be aware of this and does not know how to stop. But tough, is is an adult and we are responsible for our own bad behavior. There are many consequences that you can point out, from not liking to be around him, to losing his family, to health matters. It will be important to stay calm and tell him how it makes you feel. I find that angry people feel so victimized themselves that when they face the truth and break down by being confronted - they cry and the flood gates open up. Maybe you could ask him why is so angry - is he unhappy with his life - and why? He may be such a bully that he feels his feelings (if he admits having them) are never validated or understood. it coudl start the opening up process. Good luck. Grab a book, you will feel empowered and will be able to respond in ways that throw him off guard. He may not show you his anger as much after you learn some new responses. You may mention that there are so many emotions to express and he does not always have to use anger. This may be french to him, but identifying with his own feelings is the beginning. Also - it is not your responsibility to fix him, but you can learn to stop him from treating you badly. There are tools that will help in books. I promise you will feel better and have much more understanding and maybe even empathy for him. But do nto put up with it.

  • carolyn nichols

    ok i have anger problems and i know i do like if i get angry at a teacher i will keep it in and sometime tht week r 2 or 3 weeks i will go off on her cussing her and going crazy and like 3 of mi teachers has asked me if i am in anger manegment but mi parents or my counseler dont be lieve me i dont kno wut to do

  • Anonymous-5

    I am 21 years old living in southern illinois. Ever since i can remember, i have always bottled up my anger and emotions until the point where any little thing can trigger a massive melt down. I have noticed myself over the years becoming more mentally unstable.

    Most of the time i feel angry when i am at home where i have time to sit down and relfect on what events of that day has made me angry. it seems that the more i think about it the more and more emotionally unstable i get. i get so mad that just want to break some things. i relese my rage in a mannor that my parents tell me isnt normal. i cannot think i cannot eat all i think about is what was the source that has made me so angry.

    i keep telling myself that maybe i can help myself by moving away from here to somewhere where no one knows who i am. somewhere where i can be in peace with myself. i feel that the path i am on will ultimately end up destroying my self from the inside out.

  • Tiffany

    I have anger management issues i believe stem from Anxiety. I am currently taking classes at ASU, which causes alot of stress. I'm a 3rd year nursing student. I have been having panic attacks for as long as i can remember and i have phobias...I'm scared of the dark and silence..i don't like being in a room thats to dark or quiet. I recently went on a trip with friends to Cali which resulted in me yelling at a close friend of mine. we got into a verbal fight and are no longer friends.

  • angry 7th grader

    i get in fights all the time because people make me mad im always getting written up. I almost sent my older brother to er last night

  • Miche :)

    You need to learn how to control your anger this is pitiful. You will be the next Micheal Myers if you continue with this behavior..

    Im disappointed little buddy

    Miche

  • ANGRY ANDEE

    SHAME ON YOU NURSING STUDENT! THOUGHT NURSING WERE MORE CALM? ANYWAY, I SHARE SOME OF THE SAME ANXIETIES: CANNOT STAND TO BE IN A DARK QUIET ROOM OR BY MYSELF FOR THAT MATTER. I AM A CAREER SOLDIER IN THE ARMY AND THIS IS MY SECOND TIME TAKING AN ANGER MANAGEMENT COURSE. THE FIRST TIME I TOOK THE COURSE I ONLY LASTED A TWO SESSION. I THOUGHT IT WAS REALLY SILLY. I THINK I STILL DO ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO HAVING TO DO A DIARY. ANYWHO, WHAT RECENTLY PROMPTED ME TO RE-ENROLL IS LAST WEEK I PUNCHED A REALLY GOOD FRIEND OF MINE IN THE NOSE AND BLOOD WENT EVERYWHERE. I DIDNT EVEN KNOW I WAS THAT UPSET AND I DONT REMEMBER HITTING HER. I SAW RED AND THE NEXT THING I REMEMBER IS BEING IN SECURITY HANDS AND THE CASINO WE WERE AT, ASKING ME TO WRITE A STATEMENT. ALSO, LAST NIGHT I HAD A ROOM MATE THAT KEPT ME UP UNTIL ALMOST THREE IN THE MORNING BECAUSE HE WAS DRUNK AND BEING EXTREMELY LOUD AND I HAD SEVERAL THOUGHTS OF TAKING ONE OF HIS EMPTY BOTTLES AND HITTING HIM OVER THE HEAD WITH IT. GLAD I TALKED MYSELF OUT OF THAT ONE, I MIGHT HAVE FOUND MYSELF IN THE BRIG! WISH ME LUCK THIS TIME...

    ANDEE

  • Anonymous-6

    i get mad when people do bad things, when i get beat at a game with my little brother, when i get mad i start yelling, throwing things, curseing, its like i want to shoot someone, or sometimes when i get mad i dont go out rage i get depressed, it outta control, i dont know if i have anger problems or not.

  • CONFUSED

    MY BOYFRIEND....GETS VERY ANGRY EASILY...AND REALLY OVER NOTHING....I DON'T KNOW HOW TO RESPOND TO THE QUESTIONS HE ASKS...AFRAID THEY WON'T BE RIGHT ANSWER HE WANTS TO HERE....OR WHEN I'M UP LOOKING FOR SOMETHING...HE WANTS TO KNOW WHAT I'M DOING....IT'S LIKE I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE IN MY OWN HOME.....HELP

  • Brittany

    I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months now, but we have been fighting so much lately! If i want to go out with my friends, he asks many questions and gets mad when i want some girl time. When we first started dating, he was the sweetest guy i had ever met now he gets really upset over nothing... When he gets mad, he will punch himself countless times in the face, and scream and yell in my face as if i can't hear him! He also grabs my wrists pretty hard, but he doesn't realize his own strength. He will even cry over things that aren't a big deal at all. Sometimes it feels like he's my dad, because he tries to boss me around and tell me what i can and can't do. I hate it, but i feel like i have to lie to him just to hangout with my friends... I believe that relationships need honesty, but he makes it hard to be honest about what i do... I want to be with him forever, but if his anger continues, i just don't think i can handle it. We got into a big arguement over the phone the other day, and i told him that if he can't change that we cannot be together. Then, he txt me about 5 minutes later and told me that he was going to kill himself because he can't live without me and he feels like no one wants him around. When he told me that i got scared and called him. Obviously were still together, but i just don't know what to do anymore. I'm sick of the yelling, and him making me cry and feel like everything is my fault... I think he needs anger management...

  • Victoria

    Im sooo angry!!!! I have always known i had an anger problem but i never thought it was that bad because i could control it. Well, im 21 and carried a child for 9 months just to lose her 45 minutes after she was born! It was expected...and i handled it really well for the first week or 2. But now ive got all these emotions and feelings and im just soooo angry because "God" took her from me. Being sooo angry now has brought out all of this anger from the past. Ive got to the point where i scare myself because i just wanna tear shit up!!! Literally I dont know what to do about it. Ive called a councilor but im not sure that will help. Just today i threw my tv across the room....and i just had a c section 3 weeks ago!!! Not a good idea... but i couldnt control it....i mean i was really ready to kill...(not really) but you know what i mean. Im not sure i know what to do about it or how to even go about fixing it. Im not sure anger management will help because i feel like i need to just get it out.....ya know....tear things up just to let it out....someone help me!! Im scared for my marraige....my well being....my life....i dont want to feel this pain anymore and im tired of being soooo damn mad all the time!!!! HELP!!! Im not crazy i swear!!!

  • Sid Da Kid

    Sometimes I get so angry my eye starts to twitch and all i wanna do is destroy something.Lately Ive been super angry all the time. Everything erks me and makes me extremely angry its like i dont get mad a lil bit i get mad alot i b goin from 0 to 60 like that. Like the other day i hurt my finger on a door and I punched it while yelling F**K!! I dont know why i just be so angry all the time..all day everyday its takin a toll on me that i always feel alone. My daily emotions are Anger,sad,Lonely,Worthless, Lost. I ALWAYS WONDERED WHY I ALWAYS FEEL ALONE BUT I HATE PEOPLE. I RATHER BE ALONE IN THE DARK SOME WHERE.

  • billy

    that sounds so awfull and i hope the best for you

  • billy

    ive been locked up know for almost a year and at times my anger gets the best of me. especialy because i have a mom that is dying and i cant be back at home with her and you just wont believe how bad that it hurts me all the time . I try to do good to go home but U always manage to mess up and i just get so pissed off at myself that i end up causing more problems for myself

  • geen

    i dont have any anger problems but when i come home i feel like my parents are alwaysss complaining about sometin and that nothin i do is right mostly my mom gets on my lasst nervs im starting to hate her shes got this little sceam planned out to break me and my bf up who ive been with for 2 years and whenever she starts i wanna break thngs and my chest hurts im soo sick of her! but its only her i cant have onee good day wthout being depressed or mad anymore..do i have a problem?

  • melissa

    I am very angery with the person i am today...i just got suspended for fighting at school over something so stupid!!!!!.....and now i gotta go to court and it sucks..this isnt the first time i had to go to court!!!!!nd i have so much stress on my shoulders that i dont know what i am going to do next!!!!! sometimes i feel lyk i wanna hang myself!!!!sum one help

  • Anette

    The relationship I am in started out online by chance therefore, it was long distance. For a year we visited eachother when we could and kept in touch, but then in January 2009 I moved out of my mother's house and halfway across the country to live with him. After living with him for 8 months I found out he had cheated on me the months before I moved. It has been 10 months since I found out and I still get very angry sometimes, although I don't get angry as often, I still have outbursts that are still intense. Is there a way I can view this differently that won't evoke so much anger, or tips to stay calm during arguments? Or, is it time to find someone else because my anger means I just can't forgive him? I always feel ashamed and guilty after my outbursts yet I felt I just had to get them out.

  • Georgina

    I am only 11 but i seem to lose control of my temper. One little thing just sets me off. I start shouting and screaming at my parents, who don't deserve it at all, if anyone has any tips please post them.

  • paulina

    well im a veryy angry person i snap like hella quick im one of those type of persons that if you try to get attitude or talk shit about ill fu*** cut you i mean cuzz you out

    i get very angry specially at my bf we been together for 2 years and im agresive i used to punch him or stary shit for nothing becasue he whould get me so angry cause of other girls or even if he looked at someone else i even whould break his shit glasses windows and i once stabbed him in his arm but he whould hit me to but playing or say that i was a bit** and i whould snap his mom dont like me she says i make him mad and what the things i do i really want to change this anger issues is it anger management help i need to knoww help please!!!!!!!!!!

  • Bryan

    Heya '', I am a 23 year old regular guy, recently I have been in a lot of fights ranging from road rage 2 even smaller matters like who finished the toilet roll, I have been doing kick-boxing from the age of 13 and it feels 2 calm me down 2 an extent, exercise helps clear my mind but I can't exactly do push-ups during an argument can I?! I recently been admitted out of hospital after a car accident,my anger was about 2 get tha better of me as I was gonna destroy the 42 year-old drunkard who wrecked my ride, when I realised my cure and solution- my girlfriend of 16 months is the only person in the history of my life who can calm me down, she actually wears the pants in our relationship. I have never felt sooo in love with somebody before, she knows this and she won't let my anger come into the picture, whenever I am on the verge of going wild, she orders me to sit or she will hold my hands together then make me say a short prayer. There were times when I angered her and she has beaten me up 2 the extent of a black eye and scratches but I never attack her, I will just feel like I cannot harm the most important person in my life. The point I am making is that I am always told exercise helps with anger and it does but it is never as effective as having somebody meaningful-who you consider before yourself and open your heart 2wards as well as trust. I came across this website looking for a way 2 improve myself for her as we have just got engaged on Saterday. I am SORRY if I have written alot- I am just trying 2 share my experience and hopefully learn from the other stories I have read. I wish you all well and be AWESOME, BY-BY

  • aliana fontanez

    look i struggle everyday everyone teases me im never happy im always angry having anxiety ataccks at home i mtry everyday and pray if god can help me

  • Senior--Edith

    i keep arguing with my mom and i wont shut up cuz i cant stop until she will listen to me or til i pist her off. not only tht but i like to make ppl tht i dnt like feel scared of me i love the rush of fighting but i dont want to do tht anymore and i dont want to argue with my mom anymore but i just cant control my anger wen im angry i hit stuff i throw things i cuss at everyone i just go crazy and want to just punch ppl or sumtimes think of killing them but i kno im not tht of a mean person...wat can i do

  • Falisha

    HI I'M A 24YR MOM OF TWO AUSTIC LITTLE BOYS 2 AN 4 THEY ARE GREAT KIDS THEY AMAZE ME BUT EVERYTHING THEY DO *FIGHT*THROUGH THINGS * BITE* YELL* MY 4 YR BEATS HIS LITTLE BROTHER EVERYTHING AROUND ME MAKES ME ANGRY I SCREAM THROUGH THINGS I YELL ALL THE TIME I'M CONSINTLY FIGHTING WITH PEOPLE MY BODY HURTS ALL THE TIME I CANT CONTROL MY ANGER ANYMORE AND I'M REALLY SCARED THAT IM GOING TO HURT SOMEONE I CARE ABOUT IF I DONT GET SO ADVICE IVE TRIED ALOT BUT MY ANGER IS SO BAD THAT I CANT CALM DOWN I CAN NEVER GET ANY TIME TO MYSELF UNLESS I GO ON A WALK BUT THAT DOESNT EVEN HELP HELL I STARTED YOGA AND NOW I THINK I SPENT MORE TIME FIGHTING WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY THEN I DO HELPING MYSELF thankyou for listening please any advice will help

  • Anonymous-7
  • justine hilker

    i'm a 16 yr old girl and i love my family so much, its just the littlist things they do just piss me off. then i yell and scream at them i just dont know what to do, and i say stuff to them that hurts them and i dont mean to its just i get so angry!! i think i may need some help, i think it's because my dad died a while back and ever since then i've become depressed/angry :( and i dont wanna be like that anymore

    - justine hilker

  • Lydia

    Justine,

    I am so sorry for your loss of your dad. That must be so incredibly difficult.

    With grief comes anger sometimes. You might feel mad at your dad, then feel guilty about being angry. Or you might get mad at God/ the universe, etc. Or the doctors... It's part of grief. And it's ok to be mad right now. It's ok if you're mad at your dad. It doesn't mean you love him less.

    It might help if you can get involved in a grief support group for teens. Ask at your school. Hospice also often runs various groups.

    Take care and hang in there!

  • rosa

    HI I'm a 15 year old an as i was reading many of you are young to have to pass through what your going through. i which you could please read these whole comment before you guys decide not to. i have lived a very ruff life myself my father was a drunk and drug attic he would always fight with my mother and my mother ended up getting help for domestic violence. now my father turned to god and everything is much better. it took 2 years of prayer and fasting from my mother and others so my dad could finally become a christian, but it was worth it! i know this isn't about me, but about you. many of you maybe are against christianity or may not even believe in god. i ask of you to please give it a chance even if it's the last thing you would choose to do. please try it.

    anybody please give it a try, what do you have to lose. maybe it helps you maybe you'll discover that you actually like christianity. even if you don't become a christian just try a prayer once in a while you wont lose nothing for just giving it chance!

    i know i have written a lot thanks for actually reading all the way and hopefully you can see that maybe there is a small chance that god will change your life for the best!

    GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!!!! and hopefully i could hear from some of you knowing that this has helped!

    give me an email i would love to listen to all you problems. i know god will give me the wisdom to help you.

  • Anonymous-8

    im 17, i have bad anger issues im always fightin with my brother and family..i dont know how to help myself

  • A.J

    Should i see a doctor if I am having trouble controling myself when I get angery? Just last night I beat up my family friend because he was watching pornogrophy in my house. I have been punching windows and hurting myself and others. I have been praying and reading the bible about anger and I know that I shouldn't lash out at people but, when I am provoked to anger It feels like I have been bottling up my anger then when that person says one thing wrong BOOM i hit them then I go to jail. Sometimes I vision myself actually killing them and imagining which punches I should throw or even how I could dhot them or something crazy. I can't remember what made me snap last night but, I was yelling so loud and I even said i was the devil. please help me

    Dr. Dombeck's Note: It certainly does seem that your reactions are excessive and self-destructive (if you are being jailed and/or punching walls). Seeing a Doctor is a reasonable idea if you suspect there may be some medical problem underlying your anger, or if you are seeking some kind of medical treatment for your mood problems. A doctor may be in a position to prescribe something that may help. A more direct and to the point thing you can also look into is signing yourself up for an anger management course or group in your area. Such classes or therapy groups (depending on how they are run) teach you methods for keeping your anger under better control.

  • MATTHEW A LEWIS

    somtimes i get so mad when people tell me what to do i was dating a 23 year old women and i fell in love with her and i got locked up and committed to the state and i was so mad because i wonted to spit in my judge face when he told me that i was committed because i wont get to see my grilfriend anymore and im going to miss her

  • Claudia Gonzalez

    I'm a pretty young mother 26, my 6year old son means the world to me. I would never want to harm him in any way. I just can't seem to control my anger.

    I feel the need to grab a couple of drink before I get home. I'm can't stop yelling at everyone around me at home over the stupidest things. I feel the need to bunch something so bad whenI'm this upset. I don't listen to anyone when I'm this upset. It's almost like I'd rather be anywhere else except home. My son doesn't even want to be around me anymore, much less sleep on the same bed. I wish I understood Why I'm so mad at the everyone almost all the time, and anything could set me off

  • Uncertain

    I started dating someone a couple of months ago. We are both about 30 years old. After a couple of weeks he had an angry outburst after drinking liquor. He was screaming and got in my face and I seriously thought he was going to hurt me. I ran outside and told him that I would call the police if he hurt me. We talked the next day and he said he shouldn't drink liquor. I found out later he has had at least 4 DUI's. I feel like I should have walked away at that time but didn't b/c I felt badly for him, but I also know that he is responsible for his situation. He can not drive for 2 years, at least. It turns out that he got into an altercation with an officer at his last DUI arrest and was beaten by the police and in the hospital for three days.

    Today he blew up at me for reasons that don't make sense. He said that I have too much stuff and he started a fire for me to burn my things. We had talked about having a bonfire so that I could burn some old mail, etc. However, he started a fire without letting me know that is what he wanted to do this afternoon and when I acted surprised after the fire was going b/c I was in a different mindset about what I wanted to do this afternoon he got mad...he said I was ungrateful b/c he built a fire for me. I tried to explain that he failed to communicate with me and ask if that is what I wanted to do. He got so angry he kicked my boxes of things, including important paperwork, all over the yard while yelling at me. He tore the hat off my head and ripped it. I am so afraid that next time he will hit me or worse. I quickly packed up my car , afraid the entire time that he would hurt me. I left without saying good bye. He left me a message on my phone saying that he was the man and I was the woman and I needed to learn my f-ing place, etc. I know just writing this that I can't go back to him. He was so sweet most of the time, but if he is acting this way so early in a relationship it won't get any better. I have never dated anyone who acts this way and although I like him a lot and we actually get along well most of the time, the rest of the time these angry outbursts are enough to chase me away...along with the DUI's and all that surrounds that. Thanks for letting me vent, it is very theraputic.

  • anonymous 22 yrs old

    Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 4 years .. we have alot of disputes which in terms she says i have anger issues . ive been tryin 2 full fill her needs as in cooking for her and helping her clean and have been trying my hardest. we get into disputes and she takes the smallest comments out of context instead of letting me explain fully she would rather cut me off and say she agrees 2 disagree she also takes everything as if its a personal attack when really im stating my opinion . this fustrates me and i tend 2 raise my voice and speak with bass in my voice after that its hard for me 2 come down i neva resort 2 violence i i try 2 walk away at times becuase my point or words becomes meaningless 4 the simple fact that she chooses not 2 listen . i at times feel like she wants the man role in our relationship . there are other times that ill do one thing wrong and not the way she wants it 2 be like 4 example i was cooking her breakfast and she wanted coffee but i hadnt brewed it but i was already cooking so i asked her if she can just brew it she instantly put a face on started mumbling under her breathe and basically aggressivley made the coffee meaning she was slamming the pot into the coffee maker and being very ruff showing her anger this sent me into imeddiate aggrevation . i go 2 confront her and yes i did come out angrily but i did not attack her i just asked her why she acted so upset and she turned around and insisted that she didnt have an attitude that i was over reacting honestly i have no idea wat 2 do she is the only person that gets me this way and i kno i dont have anger management issues becuz i am not passive aggressive and havent been in a physical fight since i was 13 i need help dealing with this and need help on wat i should do or how i should handle this .. it doesnt help cuz i am madly in llove with her

  • Anonymous-9

    I'm writing this because I think my boyfriend may have a problem controling his anger. We have been together just about 4 years, and it has been a wonderful 4 years at that, but I think he may have a problem. Whether is comes from a deep down personal problem or just serface problems when we argue, he seems to always get mad... even at the little things. He has never resorted to physical violance or anything, just yelling and screaming and sometimes hitting things (walls, doors, etc...) but it makes me very nervous and a little scared that one day he might let his anger get so out of control. I don't want to leave him, I love him with all my heart and we have a beautiful little boy together, but at the same time, I don't think I can take too much more or this. I want him to understand that he needs to stop and think aobut what he's doing before he freaks out for little to no reason. But it is very hard to explain that to him, because when he gets all worked up, he's not in the right state for listening. What should I do? Any ideas?

  • secret

    Hi my names secret i am 14 years old and i think i have anger issuse. when i was younger i would never talk back or get exremly anger at people like i do now i was always a goodie goodie. i dont know if it beacuse if the fact i am a teenager and going thought my little fase thing. but i think my anger is getting worst. like a few months ago i had a paper due in english class and i turned it in a day early but i forgot two of my info papers and my teacher stated yelling at me asking me why i forgot them at home and i told her that i just forgot them and ill bring them in the next day. then she started yelling that it was going to be late and all this other stuff, then started comparing me to other kids in the class witch is one thing ive always hated since i was little and i started getting attitued yelling back at her saying dont compare me and i strangely started talking super fast and some of the things i dont even remeber saying and got kicked out of class and when i was expaining what happen to my pricipal i started gettign angry and crying. and something after that point just i dont know how to explain it. sometimes when people get me angry or dont agree with me i get really mad and sometime my family says its like i have terets because of they way i talk and react to those thing ive researched signs of having anger problems and most of the things i have read explain how i start to feel when i get angry or mad. Can you pleas help me!?

  • Gabriella

    im 12 years old and i used to be a tipical girl that argued with my brother but its got worse, i flipped out the other day at my brother and almost broke his arm. i never used to be like this. when someone says something is the wrong tone of voice i get angry inside and want to shout at them! i hate being like this and my parents arent realising my anger is getting worse! my mum thinks its my hormones but i know its not. i just want to be my usual self. im getting worse and want help.

    when someone says something to me thats not right and i get angry, i clench my jaw, and tighten my fists. but at the end of my little angry moments i just cry and cry! i feel so guilty because ive just screamed at my family, i feel like i should comit suicide. sometimes i want to. i can feel my anger getting worse, and dont know what to do..

  • unknown

    I am a 30 yr old transboi, I have been feeling as a boy all my life since i was 4. I grew up in a broken home, my father was a drunk my mother struggles to have food rent paid and other bills. I was always picked on at home and at school. bullied all the time, my depression came out then anger. It wasn't as bad as it is now. I grew up with a career in my mind, that would finace me perfectly for Treatment and surgery, But my parents took my dream away, [working for a comercial ailines]. I then met this guy after my sister got married, and he was my best friend, but my parents and church intervine because to them it was wrong and dirty, My anger started to built up. One night i had a terrible fist fight with my dad, he then threw me out of the house, this fu**er took my future i couldn't have friends around and he goes and brutilize me i just had it and hurt on his ass badly! So i went on my besti and ask him to married me it was shocking for him but in a month. we got married. I never wanted this Cuz i am not the wifey/mommy type [being that i was a man] myself. So i became a wife a mother and a dumba** school bus driver my chance arrived To finally do my treatment saw a therapist who happens to be trans himself all he did was took my money insurance fraud me by taking my money as well and a doctor who was a mayor bi**h who refused to give me treatment is there something that they all see in me that i can't? I FLIPPED ON MY THERAPIST FLIP ON MY DOCTOR AND EVERYONE AROUND IT WAS HARD TO COME OUT TO THEN GET TURNED DOWN LAST FEW DAYS ONE OF THE CO. WORKERS TOLD ME AT MY FACE I AM NO MAN THAT FLIPPED ME OUT ! BIG TIME! AND MY EX WHO SAW ME AS A MAN LEFT ME AND CAME BACK MARRIED AND PREGNANT DOESN'T SEE ME AS A MAN INSTEAD WANTS TO USE ME FOR HER BENEFITS AND MY OTHER EX GF AND I FLIPPED I YELLED AND THREATEN TO KILL HER IS THIS FU**NG NORMAL? LATELY I AM TAKING MY ANGET IN BREAKING MY VALUABLES! HELP ME PLZ!

  • charlotte

    alot of things have hppened to me, i am 14 years old and have dealt with serious bullying, i get so angry i cant focus, my head hurts, i feel sick, i swear i cant help it i want to hit people and oftern end up hitting myself, dont no what to say to my parents help anyone? X

  • Lawrence

    I Think i have anger issues as i punch and hit the floor when my console isnt working. also my little bro annoys me so i start hitting him,come back 2 me plz

  • Lawrence-

    Sometimes in my home, i get stressed. my mum ask's me to take the dog out for a walk 24.7 And my brother I Try to hold it in Sometimes.. i succseed BUT I Know 1 day I Will Scream And start trashing teh house help me before its too late for me.

  • jenni

    hello there! today i had my first speech class, its a very important class to me, the main reason why im taking this class is to get over my fear of talking in pulic and panickinrvousg so its not only a college class it means more to me.

    my teacher called volunteers to talk in front of the class, I couldnt but I wanted to :/ (I was soo nervous) when i went out of the class room tears were coming out of my eyes then i drove to around town i felt like another person, I was screming mad, full of frutration ( i have to say I was holding things for along time) I couldnt control what i said or what i did,thank God nothing happened. I cant understand what happend to me, i think is frustration. little help please thanks! :)

  • Anonymous-10

    today, at my computer programming exam, me and my classmate got into a fight. I got so mad I hit him with the keyboard and I wanted to do it again, but my other classmates stopped me. At the time it felt awesome, but then I realized what I did and felt terrible. I need help controlling this, I have serious issues controlling my rage

  • mickky

    i think i have anger issues.. im in 9th grade. and in 7th grade a was a little bipolar but i started controlling it in 8th grade. i was really happy and got along with everybody. then i moved to another state, and i was stressed out for a while having trouble adapting to the place. after a while everybody seemed nice. but for the small amount of time that i was stressed out, my anger came back 10 times worse. i think its because of the mixed emotions i have about my ex girlfriend but i dont know. most of the time, my mom will tell me to clean something and i'd do it, but then she'll keep bugging me about it and i'll flip outt. most of the time i wit till she leaves the room and kick or punch the wall. and whenever my ex posts something on fb that upsets me or makes me feel sometype of way i get mad and hit or throw something. last night i was worried because i was trying to sleep because i had school in the morning, and my mom woke me up to clean the dishes and i got angry, then when i finished i tried to fall back asleep but i couldnt so i got really anger and started crying then i barely remember what happen but i know i was punching the wall and door alot. now i have scars on my knuckles. i want to control my anger and be more social but idk how. why do i get so angry ?

  • Anonymous-11

    Im 16 years old and Im a fun loving girl. I can be watching television or listening to music and if someone comes in and annoys me I just flip. I just get really angry. Its only my family that I get angry at, not ever my friends. I just shout and really hurt them by insulting them. Sometimes at home I just like being alone and I dont like it when people won't leave me alone. I want to be sociable and seen as that fun loving girl but I think that all my family just see me as moody and a horrible person to be around.

  • Michelle

    Hello I'm a thirteen year old girl who has too much anger. When I was little I never had any problems, but growing up I started to bottle up anger such as my parents telling me to do this and do that.. it's too much with school work and taking care of my youner siblings. Sometimes when I'm angry I start to raise my voice, I feel hot/sweaty, I ball up my fists, I just want to hurt them then and there, but I try to compose myself because I know I'll regret it later on. In the past I have pulled a butter knife on my sister.. that's when I notice I went too far... Recently I've been isolation myself from the world, I just want to yell/scream. There have been some occasions when I've punch the wall, slam the doors, etc. I'm now trying to release anger by counting or banging on my snare drum by releasion the stress.. I just don't want to hurt the people I love.

  • Alba

    It seems like this website needs oversight by a professional, who can offer suggestions to those writing in.

    There may be only one reason behind our anger, or dozens. Am I feeling hungry? Lonely? Tired? We need to meet those basic needs first. (Eat. Call a friend. Take a nap.)

    I think a lot of us would feel better if we just had someone to talk to. Someone who can listen for more than 10-30 seconds, who knows how to keep secrets, and who is mature, and compassionate. A friend, a family member, a pastor or school counselor.

    Our world has become a pressure cooker. We are all under pressure. But, we need to know that being angry all the time isn't going to help us make friends. And if a friend is angry all the time, raging and hurting us, it's best we create some space. And find some healthy friends.

    I've been telling myself lately,

  • Dannielle

    my husband hit me for the first time the other night, he claims he blacked out, but also claims he slowed down his force. Is it possible for a person to black out and still slow down their force, i need to know. i don't see him blacking out and slowing down, bc then why didnt he just stop? PLZ someone help.

  • Anonymous

    I've been with someone abusive. It won't stop after the first time, it will get worse. Please ask him to get help, or make plans to secretly leave. You won't be able to tell him you're leaving without him freaking out or losing it again. I don't want to scare you, but I've been there. Please look after yourself and take care.

  • angry girl

    i am 17 i have had an anger problem for a wile when i was younger i would not show angry because i was scared of the reaction i might get growing up my mom was and still is a very angry person she would would get mad and hurt any one she was mad at emotionally and sometimes with me and brother she would hit us nothing extreme and when i was younger one of my family members would touch me and at school i was made fun of alot and i dont know it seems like when i got older i was just angry all the time i could not handle my life and instead of being picked on i became the bully for a wile there i was a bully i was mean and heartless to all the kids at school and at thirteen i was passed being a bully and started to take things out on myself i started cutting my self and acting out really bad i was passed being scared of my mom she never seriously hurt me bad but i started yelling at her insulting her tearing her down like she did to me at about 16 i was burning myself i was still cutting tho i just get so mad i just explode i i shake really bad my hart races i cant stay still and then before i know it i am going crazy i am sreaming and hitting walls punching people but that my story #angrygirl

  • bobbie

    Hello, to anyone on this website for whatever reason it may be i recommend reading Louise Hay books e.g. "You can heal your life" "The power is within you". I guarantee by reading these books this will be a changing point for you in your life. I am a registered psychologist.

  • JD

    i came on this page looking for some advise. i am 14. and i am known for helping out my friends with there problems. like there relationships and conflict with other friends in your group (as we call ourselfs) but i dont have the gift ( if you can say that) to release anger. i get angery all the time but i cant show it because i am afraid of what might happen. my parents are devorce and they live in two defferint states (i live with my mom) (my dad is remaried) and every time i do something wrong my mom starts to yell saying "do you want to go live with your father..." and i just want to yell at her because i can say so much thing that she does and she yelling at me for, but i choose to be quite. and even just typing this my whole bodie is shakeing.well i hope you have sothing for me because i just want to start breaking my walls down (not liturally but at the same time liturally)

    ps. srry if there is any spelling errors and grammer i am not the smartest kid around :/

  • Ashley

    Hey JD! You seem like an awesome kid :) Well what you did was awesome by asking for help, and actually writing our feelings down (like journaling) can help a lot too. So keep doing that. One thing that would help would be finding someone you can share your feelings with, and vent your angry feelings. It is great that you want to help other people, but you need someone to turn to also. After all, you are only 14, and that is too much pressure to put on yourself. you have gone through some hard times it looks like, and your mom doesn't seem to control her anger very well. You can find healthy ways to express your anger, but you need to find new ways to think, not modeling what your mom does. It's natural and normal to feel anger, but we can control how we express it. Some things that help: journaling, exercise, talking to someone, do something you like (distraction), read a book.... Good luck! I know you'll do great, because it's obvious that you want to learn and change. :) You're doing good, keep it up!

  • HT

    My oldest brother has a bad temper an I live in constant fear of saying anything that would set him off. He doesn't go off as often as he used to but when he does he's screams and yells. He will also get verbally abusive and in some cases he has become Physically abusive with my mother and that scares me even more than being hurt myself, but my mother to be hurt. My parents are divorced and he only acts this way around my mother probably because she won't lay a hand on him and has to male father figure around to do it for her. I am worried and just te thought of him freaking out gives me anxiety. I don't know what to do, please help!

  • Ashley

    That does sound scary. I'm sorry you are going through that right now! Have the police been involved? If he hits or threatens you or your mom, the police are usually pretty good at responding to those situations (better safe than sorry). One thing you can do (which you shouldn't have to do, but it may help) is observe when he seems to be on edge or more upset than normal. If he escalates too much (gets too mad), that's when people do things that are violent and that they would regret later. If you notice that he is edgy, try to give him his space, and let him cool off for a bit. Try not to talk to him when he is like this. If your mom could get him to counseling it would help, but depending on how old he is, that may be hard. Usually when people react like that it is because they have a lot of confusion or pent up anger inside that they don't know how to get out. Good luck! You are an awesome kid!

  • Veronica

    Hi, Im also 14 going to be 15 . For as long as i remembered i through really bad temper tantrums i didnt have the best life growing up and i can still say i dont currently. Ive been having for what looks like Anxiety and Panick attacks since i was about 12 . I was anorexic when i was 11-12 and would also cut myself . I have really bad self esteem and dont always make the best desisions . This past year ESPECIALLY when i get mad i cant control myself and sometimes black out ive gotten in two fights at school this year . And before my Last Varsity basketball game my mom and i got into an arguement and i punch a brick wall . I fractured my hand. When i get mad i tend to throw,kick, and punch things and i pase back and forth alot , sometimes grunting and i get this really big not in my throat,My hands get really sweaty and i shake and make a fist Usually try to leave the situation Im starting to think this isnt normal .. But just a quick note i am a very good kid . Freshman A and B student, Varsity Volleyball,Basketball and Track runner . Any help ?

  • Anonymous-12

    Ok so ive always had a terrible relationship with my mother. i never got along with her not even as a little kid. Resently ive grown HATE towards her. when she talk to me or just looks at me, or if shes around me i feel physicaly sick. shes always nagging at my dad or yelling at him or my sister and me. its so frustrading! she used to pick at me when i was little cause i was fat. then middle school i suffered with anorexia. i got sick all the time i was in bad health. she could care less. everytime she yells at me i find myself making a fist crying and not able to breathe. i black out at time. i dont know how to deal with it.

  • ANonymous

    I am a woman and rarely ever get visibly angry.. my partner does get angry. And I just hate the standards on women.. that we have to be so gentle all of the time. I'm such a loving, caring person and I don't expect my partner to provide financially .. we have a very mutual relationship. Obviously I do expect certain things, being the female, but last time we went out I paid for our date. I just don't think it's fair though because I love this person and I do so much for them. I'm constantly worrying about how they feel, walking on eggshells.

  • ayah

    Im 13, im having some problems with my family im kind of in a crisis so whenever i get mad, when someone pisses me off, i get this really strong feeling and i start throwing stuff and slamming doors and my heart beats really fast and i have lots of trouble breathing and i get really hot and sweaty, i can manage it most of the times like cool down and control myself but its really something like a habit now and i think its not normal, and im not quite sure what it is. is it anxiety? or are they panic attacks or what? i just dont want to overreact over something as silly as this, i used to control myself the first second i got pissed and just get over it but nowadays i get crazy. I want to know if this can affect me in any way, affect my health or hobbies or anything like that. feel free to email me and i will be checking for responses everyday. im just really scared because this isnt really something usual my family think its just a reaction to whats happened and i think so too but im not sure. and if i have anxiety or panic attacks, can i cure them naturally at home by yoga or anything like that because i dont wanna see a psychiatrist because id just be a drama queen and my family would go all crazy on me like im faking something. Thank you very much and i am looking forward to an answer.

  • matthew

    When I get angry I start to shake and get very cold, especially my extremities. Its llike I'm drowning in it or going into shock. My fear is also connected to me getting cold, if I get cold sleeping at night I have nightmares...why is this?

  • Nicolle

    i have gradually let my anger build up and now the littlest thing trigger me to physically act out. i have fractured my hand twice from lashing out and not being able to control my anger. i will strike anything and i cant control what i say anymore. i think about stuff too much and turn them back on myself sometimes when its not even my fault at all or has nothing to do with me. i drink to calm myself down but in the long run i end up getting hammered and doing even more stupid shit. (sorry for my language) do i need mental help?? why have i let it get this bad? whats causing me to lash out constantly?! i am losing friends on a daily basis. i even got kicked out of my rents house because i kicked a hole in the wall and pretty much destroyed my room. i also pulled my moms hair when i was raging one time. i need answers. maybe even special help. i want to be happy and stress free again. i dont want to lose anyone else in my life.

  • noel

    my anger has been getting worse and worse i used to be able to control and aim it so well but today i got angry with my teacher i called him a few vilgur names and figured that was that but it just kept building up and getting worse i stormed out of the class room broke the door broke three lockers and scared the shit out of some kid in the halls (he ran into a classroom) but afterward i just started laughing at everyones reaction then got angrier i would not hurt someone and have generally never been the type to get into fights but an outburst like that is frightening to me. i dont want to lose friends i mean the look in peoples eyes when i go off like that it makes me feel horrible. this isnt me and i dont want it to be what can i do to fix this issue

  • Nathan

    When I was little, I would annoy my brother, sometimes on purpose, but more often it was on accident. He's 7 years older than I, so he got annoyed easily. He would pin my to the ground and sit on me until I promised I wouldn't do whatever it was again. He moved away for two years for college, and those years were my most drastic. I got much taller, and much stronger, and most importantly, much less lenient towards the way my brother would hurt me. I can't take his crap anymore, so every time he does something to make me angry, I can't just blow it off. The other day I was trying to sleep, he came and banged loudly on my door. When I yelled (cranky, of course) "What was that for!?" He specifically said "Just to make you like you are right now," which was angry. That set me off, and I jumped out of bed, stomped into his room, opened his door, banged on his wall several times, and yelled at him for several minutes. When I was finished yelling, I had to let out one last burst of anger, so I punched his door, leaving a hole. Now my dad says I have to pay for a new door with my own money, which only made me angry because I never would have done what I did if it wasn't for my brother's intentional bang on my door. This time, so I wouldn't break anything, I grabbed a water bottle and went in the backyard to throw it at the ground until it popped. Upon going back inside, my dad demanded that I pick up the bottle and throw it away, and I promptly refused out of anger of his demand. I keep saying that one of these days I'm going to kill them, and I don't want to say that. I don't think I'd ever kill them, but I might hurt them.

  • Deb

    Nathan, it seems to me on reading your comment that you are angry with your brother and dad partly because your dad doesn't seem to recognise how much your brother provokes you. Instead it seems to be you who gets the blame for things. These kinds of situations can be incredibly difficult to handle within families because the sense of injustice at how you are treated turns to anger and normally that anger has to go somewhere.

    You don't say what age you are or which country you're in so it's hard not knowing the culture of the place where you live. But it seems that you have probably reached the point at which you need to find your own place? The sense that you feel your brother and dad virtually gang up on you comes across (although you don't say that explicitly). For that reason it's very important that you don't let them, by their actions (whether conscious or unconscious) provoke you into doing something you would ultimately regret. Please don't do anything that is not easily reparable.

    Ultimately, these are feelings. Yes they come from an unjust situation but you have to take control of how you feel when you are with them. It seems that through the years you and your brother have learned how to react to each other and wind each other up. What if you consciously stopped taking his bait? How would he react? If he tried to wind you up and you ignored his baiting behaviour (you need to keep this up for weeks to break the habit), what would be the outcome? Do you think it could possibly break the cycle that you two have of constantly playing power games with each other?

    How about looking into some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) treatments? If you don’t want or can’t have the counselling you could buy or rent a book or read about it on the web. It’s a therapeutic technique that tries to make you aware of unhealthy patterns of thought that you’ve built up over the years and how these negative thought patterns influence how you feel and so act. The idea being if you can change how you think then you can improve how you feel and this has better consequences for our actions.

    These are just some ideas. And I'm not suggesting that it's you who has to change to please them. On the contrary, I'm suggesting these things so you can get out of this cycle of provocation/anger/response that you seem stuck in. You have to try to stop letting them control how you feel and react by taking ownership of yourself!

    Don’t give in to anger so that you can’t undo the consequences. Just remember that you are not defined by your brother and father. You are your own person and you won’t always live with them. Maybe it’s time to focus on yourself and carving out a good future and this normally means being selfish and attending to our own needs when those around us are not good for us.

    Get a job, an education, anything beyond what you do now. Find a purpose/goal. This will give you a distraction from your family home. It will also cause your brother to re-evaluate his own situation if he sees that you are working towards something that isn't within his grasp. Find you.

  • MK

    ive been experiencing anxiety for awhile now maybe months only because of my moms boyfriend he says negative things all the time that gets me really angry but she takes his side all the time its been giving me alot of anxiety and depression where i started to take medication just to relieve it but i still get these intense anxiety feelings and depression where it makes it hard to breathe and feel like im going to get an anxiety attack from all the anxiety and anger building up inside me. Just wondering what i can do to stop all this and feel calmer inside my own mind and body.

    Thanks!

  • Mykala

    I have always been angry becuase of a lot of stuff that happen to me in my childhood, but I always knew how to control it.

    But lately, I can't. I feel like cause I never expressed it or talked about it, it just keep building up so much that I have very scary urges that I have never had before.

    I never had the thought of hurting someone, or even killing someone till now. It almost all I think about. But I can't express anger at all. I can't even yell and I don't cry much.

    It's kind of like I'm stuck in my own body with my anger. It's kind of good though cause I'm scared that if I was able too I would hurt people and I really don't want too.

    Sometimes I get so angry I want to bash my own head in to make it stop. I do try to talk about it, or explain it but it's so much it's hard for me to even try to put it in words.

    I really don't know how to fix it, almost every little thing makes me angry and it's effects my life and the people around me.

    If anybody has any advice, I would be thankful. I just don't want this anymore.

  • Leann

    Okay, im 13 people say i have a fine life and i should stop being a wh*re about it, when i try talking to my friend she just starts saying how lucky i am and how retarted her life is! And idk ahhah well once and a while i cut my self- but i have only done 20 and only 4 in the last 2 months - idk why i do ahah but sometimes i get mad like a kick a wall and lay on the ground or something and start cryin and yelling when nobody is around- idk hahahah i guess some people might say im just a stupid little worred attention wh*re LOL ahhaha and idk why- but i freek out when my frien hangs out with other people w.e lol idek now im just babbleing okay please e-mail me amd help if yoy can ahhaha

  • carly

    Okay Well first of all I am 13 and I have a a very troubled life. My dad was abusive to me my siblings and mom. I have gotten to where my anger goes to far. It's mail because of my dad that I act the way I do but it is getting serious. I have been to a therapist for this but I don't like taking face to face with a stranger for I am very shy. But my sister who is older makes me angry. My grandparents take care of us and they have very little money yet they or should I say my grandmother gets her whatever she wants and I get nothing. It's not the fact I don't get anything it is that they have no money and when she asks for something she gets it when I ask for my boyfriend to come over my sister is saying we don't have the gas money yet she gets everything. My anger gets to te point where I have held a pillow over my face preventing me to breath and passing out. I hit my self I am rude to others and I cry until my eyes are pink and puffy. I am afraid one day I will kill my self. I can't control my anger. And I don't know what to do.

  • Happy Massacre

    Well, where to begin? I'm almost 14, I was recently kicked out of my home to live with my Dad, Grandma, and Uncle. My little sisters were booted too. My mom chose her stupid one-eyed bf over us. She called me, called me a wh*re, a c*nt, a sl*t, and informed me that she didn't think she could look at my b*tch face without smashing it. I'm going to a different school. I have an unearned reputation for being a super mega sl*t. I cut, and I'm mean to everyone in my family. I cuss out kids at school, and I'm always p*ssed off. I need help, I know I do, I'm just too afraid to ask.

  • andy

    hi i read what people post and understand it : low self esteem and losing friends but when am angry i feel so alive and like i sometimes want to kill people.By the way am 14 from the caribbean.my anger happened because to many people took advantage of me and a boy tried to touch me.On that day i got my temper. i worked out and my temper grew the stronger i got but dont worry am not some muscle bond freak.i usually keep my anger in until that one unlucky guy trips me. if any one reads this dont let some punk make you cut yourself or doubt yourself your great just the way you are. be like a river water is one of the softest things in the world yet it flows over rock.

  • Anon

    Hi everyone It seems that I get angry of the littlest of things. I get angry over playing FIFA, not being able to fall asleep and just general annoying things like a late school bus. When I do get angry I often curse a higher authority (I always take it back) and sometimes punch and thump things in anger. I also notice it's only from frustration of not being able to do things, I have an older brother who likes to annoy me a lot but I never curse then and I rarely get into fights with him, we just argue. My dad left home nearly 3 years ago now so I'm wondering if that would have anything to do with it? Please Help Me? :(

  • sravanthi

    when iam become angry simply i fight with my parent
    when person are not identifing me then ,i react it
    i will throw pillow and e.t.c
    all are avoiding me

  • Rachel

    i get angry over eveeything and anything i hit out at my bf n flip i get that mad i wanna just hurt myself and bf for no reason my heart rate goes fast i just see black and cant control mysrlf ive been on every anti depressent n doednt help im impulsive aswell .. i scare my self cos i want a better life i argue everyday im like a spoil child i dont want to lose him .. deep breathing writing it down etc u name it i behond help :(

  • Pete

    Since I was a kid I would get mad at the sillest things and would usually take it out on myself or a door. I am twenty four now and have gone through years of depression and silly anger spells , I got sick of it and decided to find an outlet for my anger.

    I started doing combat sports Thai boxing to be exact and the intensity I get from the training sessions relieve me of all pent of frustration I get . I still snap and get mad but I am better at catching myself at these times. Eveb got a punching bag at home so if I do still feel the urge to punch something , I won't have to replace any doors or seal up any walls like an idiot.

    It is not in our nature to work in the same place forty hours a week with the stress of bills and family. Thats why you feel great after completing a hard task . Anyways I am only young still as a male just feel especially for men that there is something in us that urges us to put ourselves through some hard shit other then the daily grind of working.

    I am not saying that it will subside subside your anger completley if it had I wouldn't have had to look up this article for advice on anger , but it helps.

  • BH

    I used to have terrible anger problems growing up. I have sinced worked through them and can control myself, except when my little brother starts running his mouth. I have the worst thoughts and have even tried choking him. I have told him I'll kill him. usually we get along well but when we fight, I just want to punch his face in. I don't understand why this one person pisses me off to the point of almost becoming a criminal.

  • Ben

    When I get angry it can be over the most silliest things like tripping over something or someone annoying me my heart rate gets faster and I start to cry which makes people taunt me even more which makes me get real angry and I am afraid of what I can do because I have had thoughts of attacking people or even hurting myself. It is not just the silly things like those throat I get mad about because I have also found that if I see someone fighting in a movie, video or in real life I just feel a really strong urge to join in and I get so angry that I clench my fists and my jaw till it hurts

  • Maddie

    I am 15 and moving to Germany tomorrow because my dad is in the military, so we move around alot. my mom suffers from bad anxiety and has been on meds ever since her panic attack when my dad deployed. She keeps telling me that it runs in the family and it will catch up with me. I can tell that i have anxiety problems. For example, i refuse to takd any kind of medicine because i am afraid of choking no matter how hard i try to swallow, the pill literally wont go down. And ever since i started high school, i find my self being angry all the time and it doesnt take much to get me violent. I get these anger attacks either when im frustrated (ex: cant make the bed or cant find something) or when im arguing with my mom. My mom gets really loud and mean when we argue and im not allowed to even raise my voice without getting slapped. i try to walk away and go to my room, but she doesnt let me. And its torture. I dont think she understands just how angry i get. I havent told my parents about my anger attacks, so they dont understand.

    When i have my anger attacks i dont calm down until i destroy something or hurt myself by kicking a wall, etc. the remorse of breaking something usually brings me back because i realize what ive done and i feel ashamed. Pain also brings me back. Ive never intentionally hurt myself and dont plan on but accidentally hurting myself in the rage brings me back because i focuse on that. the colser we get to moving the more angry i feel. Its gotten to the point where i can sort of control it by writing in a journal, but i just had another attack in our hotel when i was alone and almost broke my glasses. I dont know what the purpose of me writing this is. Maybe just to share with someone how i feel. Any advice is welcome and appreciated.

  • Jess

    Whenever I get angry I tend to break things (attempt to). When I do this and I'm angry it's like a whole other me becomes a person. I think my whole other person (let's call then Emily) thinks that breaking things will make the person that upset me angry too. (ex: I threw my brothers iPad at him because i thought it would hurt him) Emily (the other mthe hires to take jess over and I hate it. As I also have OCD it doesn't help at all with my anxiety problems. I can't eat with cutlery that has been in the bottom of the draw and if a glass has a spec on it, I would rather not have a drink. I self harm and get critasisum from people at school.

    hid you have the same problem please contact me

  • Matthew

    I'm a forty eight year old male who was stalked in the past by my wife's ex-husband and in turn had many of my personal things sabotaged and attempts on my life. My wife has children with him and I have to interact with them on a daily basis. It seems that when I hear them mention him in casual conversation that I start to build up with extreme anger and I have no patience whatsoever for anyone. For example, went to dental appointment and I was waiting forty extra min for they were backed up. Every person that I looked at Made me extremely frustrated and angry. I left and slammed the door got into my car and drove like a madman thru traffic. I was screaming at the top of my lungs just to release this anger but found no relief I couldn't get myself out of this psychotic rant no matter what I did. I stewed all day in anger and only found relief in a bottle. Now I'm fine but have a slight hangover. But, I feel better and am writing this for I know I have a problem. Anyone know f any pstchotherapists in the Denver metro that take medicaid.

  • anna

    I'm 13 almost fourteen my mom is bipolar and has not been the best mom. We get in arguments everyday she cusses me out puts me down whatever she has to do to make me feel bad. She terrifies me honestly but I've put up walls and then it turns into anger I've done many things to let it out cutting screaming reading punching things but she always comes back and makes it worse. And she always lies to my dad on how bad I am which makes me want to kill myself bcuz he believes her. I need this to stop I don't know what to do about my anger she just upsets me so much.

  • Isabella

    In response to Anna's comment, I just want to say that, while I can't imagine how it feels to have a mother who treats you that way, I do know how it feels be so full of frustration/anger that all you want to do is cut yourself or fantasize about dying.

    I also have a mentally ill mother, but she usually gave me the silent treatment, which was quite confusing and painful. Your mother may be ill, but that does not give her the right to abuse you emotionally. Unfortunately, it sounds like she is very ill-equipped to give you the nurturing all of us need from our parents, but that does not mean that you have to put up with it all by yourself.

    I don't know how easy it is for you to access public services, but many cities have confidential resources for teens to seek help without the authorization of a parent. If something like this is not an option, then you can always use this resorce here:

    http://www.suicide.org/teen-suicide-and-youth-suicide.html

    It has a variety of phone numbers and is not strictly for if you feel suicidal, so call them if you just need to talk as well:

    1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255)

    Please forgive me if you've been told these things before.

    I am a 30 year old woman currently studying developmental psychology and am investigating parental abuse and it's impacts on children and I found your post heartbreaking. Please don't ever think you are alone with this burden. There are lots of people who would be more than willing to help, even if it's just to listen.

  • Josh

    Me and my brother have neer seen eye to eye. Mostly because our personalities are both similar and yet so far apart. For instance, we both like video games but ridicule the other on the types of games we play, we like sports but he prefers football (soccer) and I like basketball. After our parents split up we both ended up on the opposite sides of the confict, me with my mother him with my father. My sister, who'm is the middle child is also more on my mothers side but she's nutural. My father fed him lies about my mother and grandmother whilst my mother never said anything incriminating about my father other than calling him an a**hole (which I believe).

    Since now my mother has remarried and her new husband didn't have a big enough house I was made to live with my grandparents. The only problem is my brother comes down from my fathers to stay over for the weekend every other weekend. We've always fought, shouted and swore at each other to no end with the occasional fists and tackles into the other.

    Anyways one such weekend my dad wouldn't get a taxi together for my brother to be dropped down so I had to call my brother for his adress so the taxi could pick him up. He went into a b**ch-fit about how 'he shouldn't be doing this' and that my mam never does anything to help. Which is bullsh*t considering that she's been running him back and forth from her house, my grandparents and my fathers since they split.

    At that point I lost my cool once more and called him the one word my grandmother does NOT like to hear under any circumstances. Needless to say, me and my brother were very loud when he got in. He made a nsarky comment, I mentioned his tiny member and we ended up with me ontop beating the living crap out of him. The thing is, I have friends who'm I joke around with about names and such and it never bothers me, not even when I was being called such names by people with malicious intent. But the second I hear it out of my brother I just want him dead.

    I wish I didn't feel this way, but with the way he acts I'm either going to end up in prison or just comepletely isolating myself from my family if he continues to be around me.

  • Sabrina

    So i have a extremely short temper, i can switch moods from being happy to angry in the matter of a few seconds or sad and upset to happy. I will find myself in a bad mood or extremely angry for no apparent reason what so ever! My dad has a very bad temper as well and I think thats where i get it from. At school i got in trouble for flipping a desk at my teacher because she was yelling at me in third grade, I get in trouble for yelling back at teachers and 3 of my teachers admitted that they were scared of me. I would fight alot, and cuss and i dont know whats going to happen next! My mom put me in boiling point classes in first grade and i tend to hold alot of anger towards people who have done me wrong. I play soccer and basketball and tend to get very emotionally involved in the game and tend to push them back or throw hands and get into fights on the field or court. So I dont know whats wrong, could anybody give me a hint or a clue on what problems i have? Anything i can do to improve these problems or not be so angry? Any advice would be very much appreciated!

  • Mel

    I'm Melanie, I have the worse temper and so does my boyfrien/father of my child. We argue and a word will set the whole thing off I will begin to talk fast louder than find myself screaming, I begin to cry while he's yelling and our 1 year old daughter is just watching scared crying i feel her sometimes pulling on me to get my attention but at that moment I'm so angry I could almost hit my boyfriend I throw things he yells he's aggessive, I cant take it any more i don't know this could be I've never been so angry with anyone before the way my boyfriend makes me I want to be a family but Im afraid I'll kill myself or him ! And for ever damage my baby girl mentally but she's the only one that calms me down before it gets to crazy I turn and look at her and see how scared she is almost makes me angrier at her dad for getting me to that point of anger that our own daughter is scared of what's happening ! I want to leave him but we can be good most days but when the fights come they come hard and i know we both have anger but how could I control this anxiety anger rage yelling screaming especially crying !!? Help !

  • Brianna

    their are times when I get so angry that I start crying.I want to kill someone and rip their head off.I think of violent things to do.I start making a fuss out of tiny things.I get frustrated and then I just break down into a verge of tears.Wht shall I do!

  • Savannah

    Im almost 22. I have been angry ever since i could remember. Even as a toddler i remember being angry and depressed about my situation and environment i was put in. My father was an abusive drug addict. My mother was with a full blown alcohol growing up. Which he mentally and physically abused both of us. I moved around quite a few times and finally landed back in florida when i was fifteen. Ever since all the unfortunate events have happened leading to that point 2009 i had multiple panic attacks and several suicide attempts. I am very angry. I took meds like prozac and lithium and seroquel. You name it i tried it. The only thing that worked was wellbutrin. But after sort of bouncing back to somewhat functional i dropped all medication and stopped seeing my psychologist. I thought that my anger and anxiety had been all in my head.. that i didnt need medicine to cope with the struggle of life. But it's been almost 4 years since I've been on medicine. A lot of horrible things continue to happen. I lost my brother. My dad diagnosed with lung cancer. I could go on and on about all the continuous bad things that keep happening, that make me so f****g mad, ive been experiencing black outs im getting so upset. Ive been trying to pray alot. And i just dont know if it helping. Becuase i need something tangible. I just don't know what my next move is. I'm jobless, broke, or the verge of possibly not having a home to stay in .. where do i go? I can't go to the closest mental health clinic because i used to work there! :( and that's embarrassing. What medicine do i need? Whats my next step to prevent me from hurting myself or other people. Mentally and physically. Please help. :/

  • Ann

    I have many situtations i could share throughout my life, so ill just share with you the most recent.

    I am a 26 year old female, i have been dealing with anxiety depression and anger outbursts for a long time, since i was a child. Through the years i have learned to cope a little better on my own by simply trying to ignore things. It used to be at the point when i would get angry or stressed and someone was still yelling at me (not in a public place) i would scratch at myself trying to let the hurt out into pain, ide pull my hair and throw myself onto the ground like a child and this happened til around 20 years.

    As i have gotten a little older and a little more wise i turn my anxiety and anger into crying. Heres the most recent situation that actually got me let go from my job.

    I worked in a cup factory assembling and welding plastic cups with machines. We work in groups and we are rotated throughout the night, groups of 2 to 3 at most. They put me with a boy who was very buligerant and kept making sexual comments about my butt. I had asked several times not to be placed with him not only for that reason but because he didnt care about the quality of our production. (i take my jobs very seriously, that could be a contibuting factor as well.) I was only at said place for a month, the younger man had been there atleast a month longer than i. So by that time, since i knew where everything was for materials he should too. In fact he knew where stuff was he just played stupid with me almost as if he were trying to get a rise out of me for some sick reason. I was trying to set up my line and he was to get the materials. he kept askin where they were, duh, the 'in' line lol. i tried to make it a joke let it roll off cuz i know hes not that stupid. About 5 mins later i still dont have my parts to start running, at this point im pissed. I started to storm over to get them myself when i met our quality assurance lady bringing the pallet over. I told her a little teary now (cuz im embarassed she had to get our things) that i cant work with this kid cuz he never does anything, theres a lack of communication between us as well. She almost screamed at me scowling in disaproval I CAN SEE THAT! after being yelled at for something that was not my fault i was shaken up. We got the line moving i was welding and he was inpecting/ whickering (taking the plastic shreds off the edge so you dont cut your lips). Its pretty hard to whicker some times it tears up your nails and dulls the tool they give you, he was half a**ed running his fingers around the cups without looking then throwing them into the box. When we work together our time clock number goes on the product, i didnt want credit for the poor products he was passing for packing. I was getting teary eyed again, cuz i didnt want to lose my job over this ass who doesnt give a crap about his work. My room mates had told me that if i lose this job i have to move. I have a yr and a half old son and no where else to go right away. Anyways, i went to a supervisor and i was flustered i told her the situation. all she did was rub my back telling me to breath, it made people stare, when they didnt notice anything else that had gone on before. she just kept rubbing at me even when i told her i didnt want her too i just wanted her to tell him to work right. After break i was put on a machine doing lids by myself. The same supervisor came over to me once again asking Are you ok? how you feeling? I said fine! i was happy by myself and away from the boy.( no sarcasm or anything i really was happy and fine :D) And this is where i wanted to hit her but i didnt i just ignored her almost mocking me... she rubbed my back again and told me to breath.... when i was completely fine and happy. ( keep in mind this is a chick about my own age.) I ended up being called by my staffing agency they said that me crying was an emotional disturbance and that they dont have time for people like that there. I was so pissed. There a few printers very upset and the other quality assurance lady who loved me said it was bullshi* lol. Its bullsh*t cuz the supervisor that made me get let go had cried and thrown tantrums herself dozens of times and shes still there....

    My fiance was upset, not just at me but at the companys ignorance. " we dont have time for people with your kinds of problems here..." Thats kind of messed up dont you think????? My fiance told me, i wish out of everything else you do well that you could handle not crying. It seems like it wrecks my life... i mean whos ever heard of getting fired for crying. It wasnt loud i didnt scream or throw anything or hurt anyone. The supervisor was the one being loud with her mocking its ok, breath and rubbing my back, of course people are going to stare at that...If anyone else has had similar experience, or can tell me how to cope without medication please reach out to me...

    Thank you...