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Am I Wallowing In Depression?

Question:

My Therapist has suggested, after seeing him for 4 months that maybe I am wallowing in my depression. I have progressed in some ways but have a tendency to relapse into depression when I experience a stressful event in my personal life. These relapses tend to last approx 2 weeks and then my mood comes up again. The stressful events are in relation to a sick member of the family, who needs a lot of care and support. I have made an effort to make a seperate life for myself away from the stress. I really would like to get my depression under control. I am at a loss how I can progress further. The type of therapy I am having is CBT. Thank you for your time.

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Answer:

I have no way of knowing whether or not you are “wallowing” in depression. After all, what is “wallowing,” anyway? I do not know, of course, but I kind of had the thought, upon reading your question, that your therapist is frustrated with you? I would guess that you felt hurt or angered by his wallowing comment.

I’m engaging in “guess work” but I wonder if the therapist’s comment reflects frustration with your progress. If so, that is very inappropriate. You are the patient and he is there to help you and not stroke his own ego. Yes, coping with depression is difficult for both patient and therapist but the therapist must remain supportive.

Very often the type of psychotherapy is less important than the skill and ability of the therapist. Whether the therapy is CBT, Psychodynamic, or Interpersonal or any other type, it works as well as the therapeutic relationship between therapist and patient.

I realize you may be reluctant to start all over again with a new therapist but it is something you could consider. I would also suggest you discuss his wallowing comment and tell him how you feel. After all, you would not be asking about that comment here if it did not bother you. Talk to your therapist about this and let him know what you are feeling.

The other suggestion I have is that you consider medication. After four months you continue to fall into depression. Therapy takes a long time and I am not worried about what your therapist thinks but only about the terrible feelings of depression and wanting relief. Perhaps medication would help on a temporary basis.

Best of Luck

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Comments
  • Anonymous-1

    i have been depressed all my life i am 38 yrs old, single mom my daughter died from leukemia in 2005, my other daughter has panic attacks just like i do i have financial difficulties my ex husband is useless i have been on ever medicine you can think of i have had 4 nervous break downs i really nerve pills but i cannot convinse the doctors i am real bad i am tired all the time feel hopeless no matter how hard i try to be happy please help me!

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